Alphabet Stories
by Scarlet R. Flame
Summary: Jalec stories with an alphabet theme. Random order. Just fluff. Seemingly random fluff. (B Is For Babysitting and W Is For Wasted is up!)
1. D Is For Duck

**A/N: This is my second fanfic, so hopefully it's better than my first (which was a total disaster...). Anyways, I got the idea to write this by someone else's story, who did an Alphabet Stories kind of thing, except it was Malec. This one is completely Jalec. Just a warning, none of the chapters are in order. Also, some of these are pre-CoB, others are post-CoLS, and there are probably some for in between. Enjoy! **

Disclaimer: Let's just say that if I owned anything other than the plot for this fanfic, The Mortal Instruments books wouldn't have become popular, wouldn't have become a best- seller, and definitely wouldn't have turned into a movie.

* * *

**D Is For Ducks**

"Alec!" Jace yelled, swinging from the chandelier. "Help!"

Even at the age of twelve, Alec's senses were always fine tuned towards his siblings. Though he was just coming out of the shower, he quickly wrapped a towel around his waist and dashed through the Institute's hallways, rushing into the dining room to see his best friend and half brother perched dangerously on top of the light fixture, a wild and terrified look prominent in his golden eyes.

"What is it?" he asked, looking around wildly. "Are you hurt? Did Isabelle do something? Jace, _what happened?_"

"D-d-d-d," Jace stuttered.

"Demon? That's impossible!"

Jace shook his head and pointed down. Alec looked where Jace was pointing and saw nothing.

"Where is it?" he asked, thinking that maybe Jace was trying to trick him into something. It wouldn't have been the first time something like that had happened.

"Under," Jace managed.

Alec looked under the table and did a double take. Waddling around through the legs of the chairs stood the beast that had Jace petrified - a common green duck.

He wasn't sure whether to be angry, amused, or exasperated. "Jace," he said, through gritted teeth. "It's a _duck_."

Jace flinched at the word.

"This is ridiculous," Alec said, turning around again. "I'm going back to my room." He ignored Jace's protests and walked out.

Half an hour later, he was about to walk into the kitchen to get himself a snack when he stopped in his tracks. Jace was still on the chandelier. The duck was still waddling around right underneath, except it had somehow managed to get on the tabletop. The younger boy was still whimpering and looked more frightened than ever.

Hodge walked in right then - oblivious to the figure near the ceiling - carrying a couple of chinese take-out bags. "Alec, gather your siblings for lunch," he ordered. "They just delivered the food."

Alec grinned. "I'll get Izzy," he said. "Jace is already here." He pointed to Jace, who was giving him dirty looks, and ran off to find Izzy. "What the...?" he faintly heard Hodge say in the distance.

As expected, he found Izzy in her room.

"Lunch is here," Alec said, opening the door.

Izzy immediately came out of her room. "Something else is here, too," she said mischievously.

"What are you talking about?" Alec asked, but his sister was already running happily towards the dining room. When Alec got there, he could hear Hodge trying to coax Jace into coming down. Jace still adamantly refused to step foot anywhere, and the duck still happily stomped around the bags of food. Isabelle was in the corner of the room, laughing herself to death.

"Alec!" Hodge called out. "Take this duck and release it outside, please."

Smiling up at Jace, Alec scooped the duck in his arms and walked out of the room. Isabelle followed him.

"Give it to me," she said.

"What are you planning?" he asked.

"I'm going to release it outside,"she said, batting her eyelashes and attempting to look innocent. It worked.

"Alright," Alec agreed, handing her the duck, which was quacking at an obnoxiously loud volume.

Glad to be rid of the animal, he walked back to the dining room.

"_Honestly_, Jace," Hodge was saying. "Would you be doing this if your parents were here instead of in Idris with Max?"

"Absolutely," Jace said, nodding his head. He was still up on the chandelier.

"It's okay," Alec said, "it's gone."

Slowly and shakily, Jace made his way down the chandelier, ignoring Hodge's protests as he walked on the dining table cloth in his boots.

* * *

"Ooh, look," Isabelle taunted, holding up a packet of orangish sauce. "Duck sauce." She made a duck face, twisting her pretty features into a weird look.

Alec laughed, earning himself a dirty look from Jace. "She's never letting you forget that," he said. "You know that, right?"

His adoptive brother only scowled, pushing his empty plate to the center of the table. "I'm done," he said. "Can I go now?"

Hodge nodded his consent. Before anyone could do or say anything, Jace was off.

Izzy snickered.

"Why are you laughing?" Alec asked.

"Wait for it," Isabelle said. "Three, two, one-"

"ALEC, YOU LYING BASTARD!" Jace yelled, right on cue.

Wide-eyed, Alec looked at his sister. "What did you do?"

She paused her snickering to smile sweetly at him. "I would go see what happened if you don't want to be decapitated by today evening."

Muttering under his breath, Alec abandoned his half-eaten orange chicken and went to see what Isabelle had done. Cautiously, he knocked on the door, only to find it swing open as he rapped his fingers on the wood. The terrorizing duck was sitting on the outside of Jace's windowsill, fast asleep. Jace, meanwhile, was brandishing a dagger at the poor animal.

Alec laughed.

"It's not funny," Jace glowered. He whacked his brother on the back when he started to laugh harder. "You told me you brought it outside."

The raven haired boy shook his head. "I gave it to Isabelle," he said. "She's the one who did this, so if you're going to kill anyone, it's her you want."

"Well, get it out of here!" he whined.

Alec took the younger boy by the hand and sat him down on his immaculately clean bed, stroking his gold hair as Jace rested his head on Alec's shoulder. "Why are you so scared of ducks, anyway?" he asked.

Jace shrugged. "I don't know," he said. "I just know that I've never liked them."

Alec pulled his brother into a tight hug. "It's okay, it's not going to hurt you."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do," Alec said, standing up again. "Now, I'm going to open the window, and all you have to do is stroke it once. Okay?"

Jace shook his head. "Absolutely not," he said.

What was it with Jace and ducks? Putting his hands on his hips, Alec stood in the middle of the room, a stubborn expression set on his face. "If you don't do it, I won't put it outside."

"That's blackmail!" Jace cried.

"Which I learned from _you_," Alec pointed out.

"Fine," Jace said, refusing to look Alec in the eye. "Let's get it over with."

Alec opened the window and gently pulled the duck inside, carrying it in his arms. Closing his eyes tightly, Jace poked the duck. Immediately, it's eyes snapped open, and it started to quack again.

"See?" Jace said, stepping onto his bed, which was the farthest piece of furniture from Alec. "I told you. Ducks hate me."

"I give up," Alec said exasperatedly, and went off to get rid of the duck once and for all.

On his way back, he saw Izzy come out of the training room, her hands full of grocery bags. Alec peered into it and saw hundreds of empty little duck sauce packets.

"Oh no," he said, alarmed. "What did you do now?"

Isabelle gestured at the training room door. "Take a look," she said, smiling.

Alec followed her into the room, his jaw dropping at what he saw. Each sibling had their own shelf to stow away their personal belongings, and on Jace's shelf, all of his things were covered from top to bottom with the sticky orange coating, including a book he'd left behind from last time.

Jace walked in at that moment. Alec quickly stood in front of the shelf Isabelle had so thoughtfully, er, _decorated_, hoping against hope that Jace wouldn't suspect anything.

Of course, he did. "Hey, Alec, want to spar?" he asked.

The blue-eyed boy shook his head. "No, why don't you ask Izzy?" he suggested.

Jace's eyes narrowed. "But I'm asking _you_."

"Izzy did it!"he blurted out, stepping aside from the shelf. Jace shook his head from side to side, looking for his half sister. She was nowhere to be seen.

Alec smiled. "I don't think you'll find her for a while now," he said, as Jace snarled curses under his breath.

"When I find her," Jace said in a dangerously controlled voice, "I am going to kill her. And then I will bring her back to life and kill her again."

Alec shook his head, still smiling. Even at ten years old, Izzy was quite a piece of work.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so hopefully I didn't botch that up too much... What did you think? For the next chapters they'll be a little older hopefully, because otherwise I can't put any romance in. I'm sorry for any OOCness and suggestions are always welcome. Please review!**


	2. J Is For Jail

**A/N: They're obviously a bit older in this one, and it's pre CoB, except Jace has already met Clary and they've dated and then broken up. Wait, is that post CoLS, then? I don't know... but whatever. Rated T for occasional cursing and violence. Enjoy! :)**

**Disclaimer: **I am obviously not Cassandra Clare, because if I were, I wouldn't be writing short stories on , now would I? I would be writing the end to City Of Heavenly Fire.

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**J Is For Jail**

"Damn!" Alec said. "I forgot my stele." He looked up at the old and dilapidated warehouse looming in front of him.

"Genius," Jace muttered, turning around to see his parabatai. "You still have your weapons, I hope?"

The raven haired boy gave him a withering look. "We came demon hunting, Jace. Why would I forget my weapons? I'm not an idiot."

"That's debatable," Jace smirked, earning himself a glare from the other boy. "Let's go." He tried to open the doors to the warehouse, but it was locked tightly. Impatiently, he took a few steps back and kicked the doors down.

"Drama queen," Alec said. He brushed past Jace.

"_King_," Jace corrected, pumping his fist on his chest. "I'm a man."

Alec simply rolled his eyes and cautiously moved forward, the soft glow of the seraph blade in his hand lighting the way dimly. "Are you sure this is the place?" he asked, looking around.

Jace didn't say anything. Suddenly, ten zombie-looking demons dropped down from the beams overhead, surrounding them. Unconsciously, Jace grinned. _Finally_, some action. He swung a blade deep into a demon's chest before it had anytime to process what was happening. He took out another two in a flash. Beside him, Alec was his own whirlwind of fury, blades whipping out slicing the demons. Suddenly, twenty more similar looking demons dropped down from the ceiling. How many were there? Jace spared a second in his fighting to look up at ceiling - and gulped. There were too many, watching the fight below from the beams they stood on with beady little eyes.

"Alec!" he yelled. "Run for it!" _Before it's too late._ As soon as he saw an opening in the hordes of demons encasing them, he ducked into it, grabbing Alec's arm and narrowly missing getting his arm cut off by one of Alec's blades.

They dashed towards the front door, but more demons stood there, blocking their path to freedom. God, it was like an _infestation_ of demons. Jace doubted that even all of New York's shadowhunter population could bring down these demons. "There!" Alec gasped, pointing to a crumbling staircase. His shoulder was bleeding badly. Jace stormed through the demons around them, one hand pulling Alec with him, the other hand slashing the demons around them with his seraph blade. They leaped through the rickety stairs, skipping two, three, four steps in an attempt to get to the top faster. Suddenly, a demon popped right in front of them, right when they were two feet away from the fire alarm door.

"Screw you!" Alec was screaming at the demon, but the blood pounding in Jace's head made his parabatai's words sound distant.

The demon grinned. "We've got you now," it said, in a raspy voice. Alec kicked the demon in the gut, making it stagger backwards, but demons were already closing in from behind them, walking up the stairs at a leisurely pace. They knew he and Alec were trapped.

Jace attempted to sink his blade into the demon's heart, but the demon in front of them was too damn fast. It snatched the blade from Jace's grip faster than Jace knew what had happened. His eyes widened.

"We're not all that easy to kill, you know," the demon snarled. "We can kill you just as easily."

There was a flash of movement next to him, and suddenly the demon staggered back again. Jace took this as his cue to slam the demon against the fire alarm door with a giant kick. He and Alec surged forward and found themselves on the rooftop of the warehouse. "How?" he managed to ask.

Alec was equally out of breath. "Shoved your... stele... down his... throat," the raven haired boy gasped, running through the rooftop. Jace followed him and caught up, leaping from roof to roof. The demons behind them hadn't given up yet, and were still on their trail. Jace jumped down to a balcony and then down to the sidewalk, making one woman shriek in indignation as she tried to place her plants on said balcony.

Jace could hear Alec behind him, saying things like, "Sorry! Didn't mean to- Well, why don't _you_ watch out next time?" to offended people on the road. Jace stopped as they reached the street Taki's was on. The demons weren't following behind them anymore.

"God," Alec grumbled, leaning against a brick wall next to him. "People can be so inconsiderate sometimes."

Jace laughed, then realized his friend's shoulder was still bleeding. "You're hurt," he said. "Where's your stele?"

"Forgot it remember?"

"Out of all the possible days..."

Alec scowled. "It's okay, we're near the Institute anyways," he said. "I can hold out for that long."

"Yes, but I need an invisibility rune," Jace said exasperatedly.

Suddenly, a police car sounded in the distance. "Someone's been caught with pot, I bet," Jace snickered.

Alec's face turned serious. "Pot is actually helpful in some instances, you know," he said. "It's saved millions of lives, and -"

"Why is the police siren getting louder?" Jace wondered aloud.

"Stop interrupting me," Alec said. "Like I was saying, pot is even being legalized in some places, like Colorado, and Washington. Besides-" He stopped mid-sentence as a police car stopped in front of them.

"Put your hands up," an officer called out. His partner was sitting in the driver's seat, eating a donut.

"Whoa- what's going on?" Jace asked, ignoring the policeman's order.

"We've got some calls from the area about two high teenage boys wreaking havoc around this place," the lazy partner said, chewing his donut thoughtfully. "You two match the description."

Jace raised an eyebrow. "How'd they describe the two boys?" he asked, as the first policeman cuffed them.

The sitting policeman shuffled around his papers and finally read out loud the description in a monotone voice. "Two, like, extremely hot, like, teenage guys, like, are running around. Like, I think they're, like, high, like, and they're like, super buff, and like, one of them is a blond, and like, the other one has black hair. Like, they look emo, or something."

Jace brought his eyebrow down and raised it again. The policeman shrugged. "That's what the girl said."

The first policeman finished reading their rights to them and stuck them in the backseat, Jace noticed Alec scowling at him. "What?" he asked defensively.

"We were _arrested_," he said. "Arrested, Jace!"

Jace laughed softly in the backseat. "Yeah," he agreed. "And us talking about pot at that point probably didn't help either." He grinned as Alec's scowl got bigger.

Soon, they were checked and shoved into the local police station's basement cells, where at least seven other guys were being detained. The female cell was in the next room.

Jace walked in with his usual swagger, acting as though it was no big deal and it happened everyday. Alec, on the other hand, looked terrified. "Don't act scared," Jace said quietly, as the policeman closed the bars behind them.

"I'm not acting," Alec answered. He tried to _ooze_ self-confidence the way Jace did, but he knew the panic was distinct in his eyes. The other men were closing in, smiling eerily.

Jace knew that he could normally take down all of these men single handedly, but right now his head was hurting and his lip was bleeding where he'd accidentally bitten through the skin. Besides, they didn't need to get into any more trouble.

In the corner of the room Jace could see a slumped figure. The kid looked maybe fourteen or fifteen, but his arm was bent in an odd angle and dried blood was splattered everywhere. Though Alec was older, taller, and generally more protective, Jace felt the sudden urge to step in front of his parabatai, to shield him from the view of the bloody kid. Alec was already scared as it was. He didn't need to see the kid.

"Freaking faggots," one of the men said. The others snickered.

Jace knew his eyes were smoldering, but only Alec's firm grip on his arm kept him from lashing out at them. "Don't." The single word kept him still.

The one who'd insulted them before stepped closer to them, pushing Jace into the wall. "I could take this guy down in thirty seconds," he sneered. He turned back to his cronies, who called out encouraging comments.

Jace smirked. "Thirty _whole_ seconds?" he said. "Against a younger boy who's smaller than you?" This wasn't necessarily true. Jace was about as tall as the stupid mundane and slightly less muscular, and he had no doubt that with his shadowhunter blood, the sneering man would be writhing in pain on the ground if he didn't shut up soon.

"_Jace_," Alec said from behind the man. The implication of the warning was clear in his tone.

The man sneered. "That's right," he said. "Listen to your boyfriend."

"Please," Jace sneered back. "I'd beat you any day."

"Wanna bet?" The man leaned in close so that Jace could smell the alcohol and something even less pleasant in his breath. "_Faggot_."

That did it. Jace, who's ego had always controlled his actions, swung at the filthy mundane. Before anyone could do anything (namely Alec, who stared in shock afterwards), Jace lunged and sent the man crashing to the ground. His unshaven jaw was bleeding and he looked disoriented.

"How much did you want to bet?" Jace asked, standing over the man. The man snarled, then tried to grab Jace's foot to topple him over, but the blond boy was too quick for him. In an instant, he was on the other side of the other room, the man's cronies watching in awe. Alec was leaning against the wall, clutching the top of his right sleeve, which was now soaked in red.

A policeman walked in at that moment, standing outside the cell. "Hey," Alec called out to him. "Don't we get a phone call?"

The cop nodded. "One each. You ready?"

Alec followed the policeman out of the cell.

The man was still rolling around on the ground, clutching his nose in pain where Jace had punched him. The other men slowly back away from Jace, uneasy at this new teenager who had walked in. Their faces said it all.

"Who's next?" Jace asked them, cracking his knuckles. All of them shuffled backwards even more hastily. "That's what I thought."

Alec came back then, the policeman walking alongside him. Jace hoped the cop wouldn't notice the man on the ground, but he did. Instead of calling Jace out for it, however, he pretended not to notice anything, although he looked at Jace with grudging respect. Jace inwardly smirked.

"Who did you call?" he asked Alec.

"Clary."

"You called my ex?"

Alec shrugged. "Would you rather have had me call the Institute?"

Jace dipped his head in acknowledgement. Looking around the room, he saw the flimsy metal bars for what they were. Flimsy. "I could probably yank these apart," he mused.

"Jace," Alec said wearily. "You just got arrested, and then beat a man up. You're kidding right?"

"Hey!" A voice rang out from the room. A beautiful tall ebony-haired girl with slim limbs walked in, the high heels of her boots clicking on the cold floor. Isabelle. Jace had never been so happy to see his sister before. The faster they got out of this dump, the better.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

Isabelle smirked. "Saving your ass, as usual," she said, as the policeman beside her unlocked the metal bars. "Clary had art class and Simon's away, so she called me."

"Does anyone else know?" Alec asked, stepping out of the cell.

Isabelle's grin got wider, which Jace took as a bad sign. His inference was confirmed when her next words were, "Mom is _so_ mad. The whole time on the phone she was yelling about bringing dishonor to the name of Lightwoods and getting stuck in mundane prisons and stuff. Dad tried to calm her down but it didn't work. It was _hilarious_."

"How did you get here so fast?" Jace asked, as Isabelle handed Alec her stele. Together, they walked upstairs and through the front doors of the police headquarters. Jace liked the sunshine.

Isabelle winked. "I have my ways."

"Jace," Alec said, through gritted teeth as he handed Isabelle back her stele, "Got enough excitement yet?"

"Why, what happened?" Izzy asked.

Jace laughed. "The reason we left the Institute in the first place," he said, "was because I told him I was bored."

* * *

**A/N: So, what did you think? The next story will probably have some Jalec fluff in it, I don't know. It depends on what other plot I can come up with. Suggestions are always welcome - for my writing and for future chapters. Please, please, please review! **


	3. P Is For Pasta

**A/N: Okay, so I would rate this probably a K or a K+, but that's it really. There's also a little romance in this one. Not a lot, but a little. (I promise I'll put more next time - maybe a rescue mission of something... ;D) But for now, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: **Nope, still not Cassandra Clare. _Dang_ it.

* * *

**P Is For Pasta**

"Fine," Isabelle said, putting her hands on her hips. "I'd like to see _you_ cook for once." She glared at Jace, who was eyeing the content of the bubbling pot thoughtfully.

"You know," he said casually, "your cooking might actually come in useful when we go demon hunting. Assuming that we, you know, forced the demon in question to eat whatever you cooked into existence." He ducked as a carefully aimed green spatula flew past his head. "That would solve the demon population problem rather quickly."

"It's not funny," Isabelle said, taking the pot and dumping the greenish liquid into the trash with a sigh.

"You're right," Jace agreed. "It's the king of comedy."

"What are you fighting about this time?" Alec asked, walking into the kitchen and slinging an arm around his boyfriend.

"Isabelle says I can't cook," Jace complained.

Alec tilted his head. "Come to think of it, I've never seen you cook," he said, earning himself a scowl from Jace. "What?" he said defensively. "It's true."

"Alright, _I'll_ make lunch today. What was that supposed to be?" Jace asked, gesturing towards the trash can.

Isabelle scowled. "It was supposed to be pasta."

Jace heard Alec make an inelegant noise, and after a while he realized his boyfriend was trying not laugh. "That was _pasta_?" he said, thinly disguising his laughter between fits of coughing. "I thought that was rotten pea soup or something."

"Three hours, Jace," Isabelle said, pointing a finger at him. "Let's make a bet. If whatever you cook is inedible or causes anyone stomach problems, you have to do whatever I say for a week."

Smirking, Jace raised an eyebrow. "What are we, ten?" Still, he shook his head in agreement. "And if I _can_ cook the pasta without making it look like it's week old vomit gone stale from being left and forgotten in the freezer, you have to do what _I_ say."

"Deal," Isabelle said. "Alec, you're the witness."

Alec shrugged, an easy smile playing on his lips. "Sure," he said.

Isabelle smiled as well, except hers wasn't full of warmth and amusement the way her brother's was. She sounded almost malicious when she said, "See you at lunch, boys," and promptly left the kitchen.

As soon as Isabelle was out of earshot, Jace whirled on Alec. "Tell me everything you know about making pasta," he whispered urgently, just in case Isabelle could hear. "I have three hours. _Three hours,_ do you hear me?"

Alec smiled. "You can't cook, can you?" he asked.

Jace shook him by the arms. "Come on," he almost begged. "Tell me how to make pasta and - I don't know - I'll pay you back. You know I will." Alec put a finger to his chin, as though he were deep in thought. "Come on, baby," Jace said, his voice soft. "Please."

Alec smiled and dipped his head as though to say yes. In answer, Jace exhaled in relief and then pecked him on the cheek. "Okay," Alec started. "This is only supposed to take about twenty minutes to actually make the pasta, and maybe another ten minutes for the sauce. What we need is ingredients. What type of pasta do you want to make?"

Jace shrugged. "What kind is there?"

"Well, there's tomato sauce, pesto sauce, cream sauce, meat sauce-" Alec was interrupted by Isabelle walking back into the room, waving a piece of paper around.

"Here are the ground rules," she said. "I wrote them all out." It read:

**Rules**

1) Alec's not allowed to help.

2) Mom's not allowed to help.

3) Hodge's not allowed to help.

4) No one in the Institute is allowed to help. (You can't ask Max to ask Mom or something like that.)

5) You have to set the table and have everything ready by the time everyone comes to the dining room for lunch.

"Dear God, Izzy," Jace moaned. "That's not fair."

Isabelle only grinned. "Rules are rules," she said, "and you have to follow them or I automatically win."

"Fine," Jace huffed, and then turned back to Alec.

"It's okay, you're naturally good at everything you do," his boyfriend assured him, patting him on the back. "You'll be fine."

Isabelle looked hurt, feigning an offended look at her older brother. "How come you're taking his side?" she demanded.

Jace grinned cockily down at her, knowing he had the upper hand here. "Because he's _my_ boyfriend," Jace said, wrapping an arm around Alec's slim waist. As expected, Alec blushed slightly, his pale cheeks sparkling with a reddish pink tinge.

"You are _not_ sweet talking him into helping you," Isabelle said, and then grabbed Alec's wrist. "You're coming with me." She dragged him out of the kitchen.

"Well then," Jace sighed, and then turned back to the kitchen, staring at the cabinets and double-sized fridge. "Now," he wondered out loud, "where does the pasta stay?"

* * *

An hour later, Maryse came back home from the Conclave meeting with her husband. As soon as she opened the doors, she knew something was wrong. "What's that putrid smell?" she asked, her nose wrinkling.

"I hope Isabelle's not wasting her time cooking again," Robert said. "Maryse, I think you'd better go up there."

Maryse did as Robert suggested and found, to her surprise, that not only was Isabelle nowhere to be found, but half her kitchen appliances were either broken, or stacked in the sink, or both. Jace poked his head out from a cabinet, his blond hair falling into his eyes. Impatiently, he pushed it away, smearing his forehead with something pink. "Yes?"

"_Jace_," Maryse breathed. "What have you done to the kitchen?"

"Calm down," Jace said, the usual smirk appearing on his face. "I'm _cooking_."

"Does cooking involve a loose sequence of manifestly inadequate observations and conjectures, held together by panic, indecision, ignorance and generally blowing up the Institute's kitchen?" Maryse asked dryly. Even _Isabelle_ had never done anything this bad. Wait, never mind, she'd set the oven on fire once. That had been a near fatal accident.

Jace blinked. "I supposed you could put it that way."

"I want you out of here in ten seconds," Maryse said firmly.

"Wait! But then I'll lose the bet!" Thankfully, Maryse was one those parents who actually listened instead of pulling out that 'No excuses,' crap. She listened intently as he explained his predicament to her.

"Just a pointer," Maryse said, showing off one of her rare grins. "Try turning the blender on before you use it. Oh, and your sauce is starting to boil."

Jace's eyes twitched immediately to the stove, where the sauce was indeed starting to boil. He turned the flame off and peered into his pot. Unfortunately, it didn't look appetizing at _all_. Muttering, he left the sauce as it was and sat down on the counter, list in hand. Scanning the list for the hundredth time, his brain worked at an overloading speed. There had to be a loophole _somewhere_.

Suddenly, Jace had one of his brilliant ah ha moments, also commonly known as the oh moment or the 'lightbulb moment'. Grinning, he dumped everything he'd been working on in the trash and settled in for a nap.

* * *

Slightly before it was time for lunch, Alec walked into the dining room half scared and half amused at the thought of eating something Jace had cooked. Smiling slightly, he took a breath and walked in, ready to face whatever was in there. He was pleasantly surprised, however, to see seven places at the table set, the pasta in a big bowl in the center of the table and some salad and cheese on the side to go with it. "I think Isabelle just found you a new talent," Alec said.

Jace grinned at him as he walked into the dining room from the kitchen, wiping newly washed hands on the cloth of the flowered apron. "Surprise," he said, smiling cheekily.

Alec chuckled. "Isabelle's going to have a fit when she sees this," he said, imagining the scene. Then he eyed his boyfriend suspiciously. "How did you do it? When I came by here earlier it wasn't smelling too hopeful."

The golden haired boy walked up close to Alec, hugging him and setting his head on the taller boy's chest. "Don't tell Isabelle," Jace said softly, his body shaking with laughter as he nuzzled Alec's neck, "but her list never said anything about _ordering_ the food."

He could feel Alec's face form a smile as the raven haired boy leaned down and kissed him gently on the lips.

* * *

**A/N: As usual, suggestions for my writing and future chapters are always welcome. Review?**


	4. R Is For Rescue (Part One)

**A/N: This one was suggested to me by you-and-I-we-have-the-stars. Thanks so much for the reviews! Anyway, surprise visit from Sebastian in this one, so yeah... It's definitely a little angsty - but I promise you there's a fluffy ending. The story's set in a different background than all the other letters... I think. I'm not sure. It's post CoLS, and I think it should be rated either T or M. Also, I think I'm going to divide this into two parts, because it's like, incredibly long. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: **I love how for each of my disclaimers, I basically have to come up with a new and improved way of saying 'I am not Cassandra Clare and I don't own these characters.'

* * *

**R Is For Rescue**

(Part One)

A walk through the park was supposed to be - well, a walk through the park. Of course, Life had been bored and had obviously decided to pick on Alec, so it had placed a random stranger behind the bushes to ambush him as he walked. As soon as Alec figured out where he was, who his captor was, and how to get out of there, he was going to write a strongly worded letter to Karma. Clearly, it needed some well-directed encouragement.

Alec opened his eyes and found himself chained to a four-poster bed, tightly cuffed but (thankfully) clothed and wrapped in a warm blanket. Despite the pounding headache between his ears, Alec craned his neck around to see where he was. The dilapidated room had a musky smell to it, like a forgotten basement, or a dusty attic that no one knew existed for the last forty years. His kidnapper was nowhere to be seen, but there were signs of another person having recently been here. Half a bottle of wine stood on the rickety bedside table; an empty pizza box laying next to it on the equally rickety looking chair.

"Get used to it," a voice said, not harshly, but none too warmly either. It just _was_.

"Who-who are you?" Alec asked, trying to keep the tremble from reaching his voice.

His captor, unfortunately, heard it and laughed softly. "You'll see," he said (Alec was sure the voice belonged to a male by now). "Or maybe you won't. But knowing him, you'll see sunlight soon enough."

Who was the man talking about? "What the hell do you want with me?" Alec asked, craning his neck as far as it would go in his position. His tied arms somewhat blocked his view.

But the voice was gone.

* * *

For six whole days, Alec could not be found anywhere in New York City. It was as though he'd vanished. The local Clave members had searched throughout the city, hunting down places the boy could have been and contacting other Claves, but no luck. No one - and nothing - had turned up. By the seventh day, Jace Wayland was ready to punch a hole in the wall, burn the world down, and then take his temper out by killing a duck. Not necessarily in that order. He was tired of Robert telling him that he _himself_ had been on enough nighttime adventures to know that Alec probably wasn't in danger. He'd probably just gone to a special someone's house for the weekend. The fact that Robert wouldn't even admit Alec's sexuality without feeling as though he'd wronged society or whatever just made Jace madder. He'd walked away from his adoptive parent in disgust.

Even Isabelle was worried. Her clothes had started to hang a little looser and last night she'd all but shuffled into Jace's room and cried on his shoulder. Okay, maybe that was stretching it a little, but still. Jace worried.

Finally, unable to stand _not_ doing something, just like Clary had once done for him, Jace decided to find Alec himself, and had gathered all their friends together in the largest booth in Taki's, although no one was eating. Even Maia and Jordan, who weren't all that close to the black haired blue eyed boy, agreed to spend the day helping him. The search was on.

"We'll have to split up," Jace said, taking a sip of coffee. It didn't help, and he frowned thoughtfully at the bitter liquid.

"Maia and I can take the railways and the southern part of the city," Jordan suggested.

"And Simon and I'll check the Institute and the other places," Isabelle said.

Simon raised an eyebrow.

Isabelle sighed in exasperation. "You know, the hotel, the underground, the police station..."

"You shouldn't go alone," Jace said automatically, then realized this was something Alec usually would have said. A pang bounced in his chest.

"I can fight," Simon said defensively, bringing him back to the present. Jace didn't bother with his usual obligatory smirk or offhand comment. It wasn't worth it.

"That leaves you and me," Clary said, looking slowly up at Jace. The golden boy scowled.

"It's okay," Isabelle said quickly. "If things are still awkward between you, then Simon and Clary can-"

"We'll be fine," Jace said tightly. He'd been in an everlasting bad mood for the past week. "I've gotten over the break-up."

Clary raised her eyebrows. "_You've_ gotten over the break-up?" she said indignantly. "_You're_ the one who broke up with _me_."

"Here we go again," Simon muttered, to no one in particular.

"Look, me and Jordan are going to go now, okay?" Maia said, standing up. "It's better not to waste any time."

Jace stood up as well. "You're right," he said, sliding out of the booth. "Come on, Clary, let's go."

They left Isabelle and Simon there, who was grumbling about having to pay for the drinks.

Looking down at the redhead and his former girlfriend, Jace didn't know what to think. Why had he broken up with Clary? All he remembered was that something hadn't felt right. As Clary looked up at him and caught him staring at her, the golden boy pushed these thoughts away from his mind. They just got in the way of the search. He felt Clary's small hand grip his palm. "We'll find him," she said softly. "You know we will."

And somehow, that was all the encouragement Jace needed, even if it was from a person he no longer loved _that_ way.

* * *

His captor seemed to have no intention of ever introducing himself. Alec found that on the second day, when he woke up, only one arm and one leg was cuffed - although on different sides of his body - and that the pizza box and the wine were gone. In its place had lain a sandwich and a bottle of water.

That is, until today. He had no idea how much time had passed, since sunlight never made its way down here, wherever here was. Alec only had the flickering lightbulbs hanging from the ceiling, and even that would probably run out in a couple of hours. With his luck, eternal darkness was guaranteed.

A figure walked into the room. Alec rolled to his side to see who had walked in. It was a tall man - no, a boy - tall, but probably shorter than Magnus. _Magnus_. The boy was well-built though, and moved with startling grace, which Alec had only seen one person ever have. Well, two, if you counted -

"_Sebastian_?" Alec gasped.

The figure chuckled, and then revealed himself, uncovering himself from the looming shadows. "Was it that obvious?"

Alec could feel his face automatically twisting into a look of disgust. "You," he spat.

"Me," Sebastian said cheerfully. "And stop looking at me like that. In fact, _I_ should be the one looking at _you_ like that. Filthy faggot."

There was a painful stutter in his chest, even though he knew Sebastian's words were meant to dislodge him. To weaken him. To break him. It was working.

"At least I'm not part _demon_," Alec hissed.

Sebastian looked infuriatingly amused. "At least _I'm_ part of a new race - one that could crush yours like nuts in a nutcracker."

Alec winced at the analogy unconsciously.

The smirk on Sebastian's face widened. "That's right," he said. "Your kind- they shouldn't even be allowed."

"You've said that already. After you killed Hodge. After you killed Max."

A delicate shrug. "It deserved to be said twice."

Alec felt his breath hitch - and not in the good way. It was almost painful to breathe.

Sebastian smiled at his discomfort, and then at the empty paper plate on the bedside table where a sandwich had lain a couple hours ago. "Why in the world would you eat something I gave you?" he tutted. "_Honestly_. Kidnapping 101."

Alec felt his lips move in response, but he had no idea what he had said. His eyes felt drowsy, his breath shallowing steadily, and pretty soon, he was no longer conscious.

* * *

"Magnus," Clary said. "Have you asked him?"

Jace shook his head. "I couldn't find him anywhere. I think their break-up must have affected him as much as it had affected Alec."

Clary looked him in the eye defiantly then, the hard twinkle showing that she would not take no for an answer. Jace knew that twinkle too well. "Why did _we_ break up, Jace?" she asked. "Was it me? Did we go too fast?" Then quickly, when he opened his mouth, she added quickly, "And don't you dare give me that 'It's not you, it's me,' crap."

Jace closed his mouth. What could he say? After all, what had driven him to give away what he loved most, who he loved most? Why had things changed between them? Jace opened his mouth again. "The heavenly fire," he said slowly, "unknitted more than just Sebastian's soul from mine. I think - I think it uncovered another place in my heart, which I never even knew existed. It was awful at first, living with you and knowing there was someone else, always in the back of my mind, lurking behind my eyelids whenever I closed them, and after a while, I couldn't take it anymore. I was ripping my heart in two." He looked up miserably at her, and found - to his surprise - not forgiving, gentle eyes, but a startling, cold green eyes.

"Who was it?" she demanded. "Who was the girl?"

Jace winced. Still, he owed this much to her. "It wasn't a girl."

Clary's jaw dropped in shock. "You're gay?"

This time, instead of looking back down at the ground, he looked at Clary in a questioning stare. "So?" he challenged. "You were okay with _Alec_ being gay."

Clary shook her head. "All this time, I was a blind idiot. I thought you loved me."

"I did," Jace pleaded. "I do. I'm bi."

The redhead seemed to reconsider, kicking a plastic bag out of the way of the sidewalk. For the last half an hour, they'd been roaming aimlessly around the city, as though my some miracle they'd bump into the sparkly, spiky haired warlock. "If Alec knew," she started. "It would break him too."

Jace shook his head, confidence energizing the gesture. "No it wouldn't," he said. "Not in this case."

Clary tilted her head in confusion. "You fell in love with Magnus?"

Rolling his eyes, the golden boy sighed. "Right, and Izzy's ugly."

"Then who?"

"Who do you think?"

"Don't answer my question with a question!"

"As long as I'm answering your question, it doesn't really matter, does it?"

"But you're _not_ answering my question."

"Now you're contradicting yourself. You just said-"

"I don't care what I just said!" Clary almost yelled. Taking a deep breath, she grumbled, "You're impossible."

"Tell me about it," a voice said from behind. Jace whirled around to find himself face to face - or rather, face to neck - with a familiar glittery man, although his outfit was lacking its usual overboard display of quality sparkle.

"Magnus!" Clary yelled in delight.

Magnus grinned agreeably. "I am rather magnificent, aren't I?" he mused.

Jace raised an eyebrow. "How did you know we were here?" he asked. "Where were you when we needed you?"

Magnus shrugged casually. "I was in the area. I spotted you two." Jace could tell he'd ignored the last question purposely, but he didn't expand.

"Listen, warlock," he said, "we need your help."

It was Magnus's time to raise an eyebrow. "_You_ want _my_ help? Good lord, this must be important. But like I said, I'm tired of being your pet warlock. Go find someone else."

"Alec's missing," Jace growled, "when he left to deal with whatever you left him with. Seven days, Magnus. _Seven days_!"

Magnus immediately stopped smirking. "Alec's missing?" he asked, running a hand through his spiky hair, a lacking shower of sparkles flying out.

"Yes," Clary said. "And how much sparkle did you use? The ground isn't like, covered with it now. I think it's a first."

But Magnus was entirely business now. "Where and when did you last see him?"

"Friday. He said he wanted to clear his head in the park." He made no effort to make a sarcastic comment, although thousands flooded his mind.

"Do you have anything of his?" Magnus asked, turning around and walking briskly. Jace and Clary followed suit.

"Don't you have anything of his?" Jace asked, more surprised than unpleasantly. He'd assumed that even after the break-up Magnus would have kept something of the other of Alec's.

The glittery man in front of him bit his lip. "I have something that _might_ work," he said thoughtfully.

Trying not to lose his patience, Jace said slowly, "What do you mean?"

"Follow me."

* * *

As it turned out, whatever Sebastian had given him not only induced him to hour long comas, but nightmares as well. And they weren't even _monster_ nightmares either, which Alec could have easily dealt with. No, these were _Jace_ nightmares.

Each one was different in their own way. In one, Jace kissed him, only for Alec to discover the blond bastard was drunk. In another one, Jace found out he was gay in a rather unceremonious fashion and stormed off in disgust, apparently scarred for life. It never mattered how it started - in each of them, Jace was featured and Alec was the disgusting gay. And in each one, Jace found a new and improved way to break Alec's heart.

The raven haired teen was just waking up from a nightmare when suddenly he heard a crash. Unable to get up and see what had happened (all four of his limbs were cuffed since Sebastian said he thrashed about in his sleep - but whether this was true or for Sebastian's amusement Alec didn't know.), Alec shut his eyes and _listened_. He vaguely heard two voices yell at each other, shouting and growling and sounding unearthly similar. Of course, there was plenty of glass-shattering and sickening bone crunches provided in the background. Finally, Alec heard a door open - his door - so he opened his eyes to see who was coming in.

And almost fainted from shock.

Jace, bloody and scowling and bruised all over, was thrown into the room. His skull hit the wall with a sound so terrifying that Alec forgot to be brave, or even to pretend. He flinched and shut his eyes, as though it would help to teleport them somewhere nice, like California or Peru, which according to Magnus, was the ideal honeymoon spot.

Sebastian came in after shoving Jace in roughly. "Oh little brother," he said, almost sympathetically. "You should know by now that the older one always wins." And with that, he turned around and walked briskly out of the room, leaving a bloody Jace and a tortured Alec in the room.

"You idiot!" Alec said. "What are you doing here?"

Jace, although beaten to a pulp, managed a smirk. "Saving your ass, fellow idiot."

Through the dim lighting, Alec could faintly make out the numerous scars on the other boy's body, which was shivering. "There's a couple blankets wrapped around me," he said, trying to bring his voice down softly. "Take them."

Jace shook his head, crouched into a ball on the cold hard floor.

"_Jace_," Alec said, trying not to grit his teeth together. "Don't be stubborn. You're cold."

Even though he was still visibly shivering, his jaw audibly chattering, the blond shook his head again. "I'll live," he said. "You're the one who's been kidnapped."

"_Fine_," Alec said irritatedly. "Freeze. See if I care."

"Of course you care," Jace said, surprising him. "You always care. I just don't want you to care."

Alec rolled his eyes, then realized the sentiment was somewhat lost in the dark. "How did you get here?" he asked.

"Magnus used a tracking spell on some blue scarf of yours. He didn't find you directly, but he found the area. Regrettably, he forgot to check the demon levels here. There were at least five nests of demons, so we had to kill all of them. Clary and Magnus stayed behind to fight."

"I don't own a blue scarf."

Jace laughed. "Is that the only thing you have to say?"

"I might have my stele with me," Alec said softly. "You're wounded."

"No."

"What are you punishing yourself for this time?" Alec let out an exasperated sigh.

"The reason he kidnapped you was to get to me. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't even be in this mess."

_No, I wouldn't_, Alec thought, but he wasn't thinking about being kidnapped. "Look, I should have been stronger. I shouldn't have let my guard down and let him attack me. It's not your fault. It's a whole lot of things put together."

"How can you just accept that?" Incredulity colored his voice like the Northern lights.

Mentally, Alec shrugged. "All my life I've been accepting things. This is just another one of those things that are hard to get through, but you do. You think you'll break from the pressure, or crack from the pain of it all, but in the end you always make it. Life is full of those."

Silence.

"At least untie me?"

Silently, Jace painfully got to his feet and broke the chains of the cuffs. The raven haired boy watched as the bruised golden shadowhunter worked quietly, sweat beading his forehead and blood beading his bottom lip. Even in the state he was in, Jace emitted a slight aura, which, however faint, brightened up the room considerably. In a matter of minutes Alec was free, although the metal still circled his wrists. Without thinking, he wrapped his parabatai in a hug, letting the younger boy hold the two of them up for a while, letting the weight behind him slip.

And then he realized he was going to go through another hour long nightmare. Had they no end?

* * *

He wasn't sure when, but at some point in the hug Alec had dozed off. As gently as he could, Jace tucked the blue eyed boy back into the bed, and then sat on the floor again, thinking. His heart had hurt so _freaking_ much when Magnus had appeared. Jealousy had crashed on top of him in tidal waves, like never before, not even when Clary had dated the stupid mundane - sorry, bloodsucker.

He watched Alec patiently, watching his delicate features so similar to Isabelle's twist into a look of disgust. A few seconds later, the look morphed again into one of torture. Jace decided to wake Alec up. "Alec," he said, shaking the other boy's arm. "Wake up. Come on, you idiot, wake up, wake up, _wake up_."

"He won't wake up." Somehow, behind him, the door had opened without him noticing. Sebastian had walked in, fine blond hair shining in the faint light.

Jace looked up sharply. "What do you want?" he growled.

Sebastian ignored the question. "That fag won't wake up. The poison's running through his system for so long now, I doubt even the Silent Brothers could undo it."

Rage washed over Jace. "What did you do to him?" he asked tightly, trying to get past his gritted teeth. It was working.

"Anger management, little brother," Sebastian said slyly.

For a moment, Jace pondered whether or not to pound him into the ground, but then he realized that while he was still wounded, Sebastian was cleaned up and ready to fight. He'd be pinned on the ground in less than a second.

"You've got me," Jace said. "Let him go."

Sebastian shook his head. "Unfortunately, you're not the only one I need. I need Clarissa as well."

"Her name," Jace said, his fists whitening alarmingly, "is _Clary_."

Sebastian waved the comment off with a dismissive gesture of the arm. "Details, details," he said, shrugging. "The point is, I've got you. My plan is ready to work, soul-bonded or not, and I'm not going to fail this time. How does it feel?" He peered down at Jace, sneering. "You're not even chained or anything, the way your precious _Alec_ was, and you're still under my power. And with that large ego of yours, I'm surprised you haven't obliterated yet."

"Sorry to disappoint you," Jace said, trying to fake a smirk. Beside him, Alec looked like he was being jabbed to death by a toothpick.

A huge crash interrupted whatever Sebastian was about to say. The older boy ran through the door and into the direction of the sound. Jace tried to follow, but found something invisible holding him back in. _Crap_. He was trapped.

**A/N: Just a random author's note, but am I using italics too much? I feel like I am. Anyway, please review! I don't care if it's about my story or your day or your friend's insane love for chocolate, but please review! Oh, and thank you for all the people who have reviewed. Like seriously. Thank you. It really makes my day. =)**


	5. R Is For Rescue (Part Two)

**A/N: Hi! Once again, thanks for the reviews. So anyways, here's part two! (I think it's a little longer than part one.) Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: **Yeah, I'm Cassandra Clare. Totally. And I like, own a hundred percent of the characters and stuff. Absolutely. (Not.)

* * *

**R Is For Rescue**

(Part Two)

_A huge crash interrupted whatever Sebastian was about to say. The older boy ran through the door and into the direction of the sound. Jace tried to follow, but found something invisible holding him back in. _

_Crap. _

_He was trapped._

Jace pounded on the invisible barrier, frustrated beyond recognition. Alec was on the bed beside him, possibly dying for all he knew, and Clary and Magnus were probably the ones who had come crashing into here. And through all of this, he was stuck in this dingy room, waiting to be saved like some damsel in distress.

A soft pop sounded from behind him. Jace whirled around, expecting to see something hideous like a demon or one of Sebastian's creations, but instead he saw a familiar lanky figure, towering over the bed. Ah, well. At least it wasn't vomit-inducing horrible.

Suddenly, the current events snapped into place in his head. If Magnus was here, and Clary was with Magnus but not necessarily _here_, that meant-

"You left Clary to deal with Sebastian?" Jace yelled. He may not have been in love with the redhead, but he still cared for her.

Magnus rolled his eyes, despite the horrifying circumstances. "She's safe," he said, eyeing Alec. "But as for this one..."

"Sebastian says the poison's in his bloodstream. Apparently, we can't do anything about it - not even the Silent Brothers." He said the words quietly, matter-of-factly. It never once occurred to him that Sebastian could have been lying.

The tall warlock waved a hand, but Jace could see his distress lined underneath the confident mask he wore. "He's never met Magnus Bane, now has he?" Magnus said, gesturing to himself. "I'll figure it out."

Jace looked at the pale boy writhing on the tangled sheets and blankets before him dubiously. To think, that all of this was his fault...

"Guilt is a useless feeling," Magnus said. The words were harsh, but his face had softened. "Come on, let's get out of here."

All the fight and emotion seemed to go out of him. "We can't," he said dully. "This place is protected."

Magnus winked half-heartedly. "I've been alive for eight hundred years," he said. "Grand escapades from Peru, rescue missions into the heart of the royal British family, even summoning the angel Raziel - I've done it all. I think I can handle this."

"Alright," Jace said. "Work your magic."

* * *

When Alec woke up, he saw not one, not two, but five bodies other than his, lying on crisp Infirmary sheets. With a sigh of relief, he realized he was back in the Institute. A hand squeezed his gently. Looking up, Alec saw his sister, nervously clutching his palm. "You're awake," she whispered. "I thought you were dying."

Shaking his head, Alec tried to explain, but something was stuck in his throat and he couldn't speak more than a few words at a time.

"It's okay," Isabelle said. "As long as you're not in immediate danger."

Alec gestured to everyone around him, all of whom were sleeping in various positions.

"Oh, them?" Isabelle asked, in a uncharacteristically soft tone, so as to not wake anyone up. Maia, Jordan, Simon, and I were called by fire-message. We ransacked Sebastian's hideout. He had a lot of demon body guards. Thankfully, no one died, but-" Tears welled up in her eyes.

Alec didn't want to see her cry, especially when there was enough pain to go around right now. It was his turn to comfort her, and he did - rubbing his thumb gently on her palm as she tried her best to hold in her whimpers. She was good.

"Simon almost died," she whispered, so softly that Alec had to strain his ear to hear her. "He was saving me." Alec felt a huge rush of gratitude towards the vampire. Sure, they'd never gotten to know each other, but still. Anyone who was willing to die for Izzy meant a lot about their relationship. Wait, if the vampire's feelings stretched that far, then-

Isabelle held a hand up in front of his face, as though she knew what he was thinking. "Don't you dare try to psycho-analyze that," she said. "Don't you dare." Alec had to smile at the return of his sister's usual backbone.

"Hey." Alec looked up and saw cat eyes staring down at him, nervously watching him.

"Hi," Alec said, his voice trembling. After the scene in the abandoned railway a week ago, Alec didn't know what to think. Was he supposed to be mad? Depressed? Guilty? The sad truth was, he didn't know what to think, didn't know what was expected of him.

"I think I'll leave you two alone," Isabelle said, getting up from her chair. Alec watched as Magnus took her spot.

"How are you holding up?" Magnus asked, taking his hand.

"Why are you here?" The words were out before he could make a conscious effort to stop them.

He regretted it as Magnus's smooth tan face reflected a look of hurt. "What do you mean?"

Alec had never really understood what it meant to get lost in someone's eyes before, what looking into deep eyes meant. As he stared into Magnus's golden green eyes, he finally understood. He could have sat there for hours and hours, content just to look into Magnus's brilliantly colored cat eyes, which were, at the moment, staring right back into his _own_ eyes, filled with worry and concern and overwhelming relief.

It was true, then, what they said about eyes being the windows to a person's soul. He'd have to remember that the next time Isabelle said that she'd cooked the cake in the oven like she was supposed to (instead of microwaving it for five minutes when she got bored) or when Jace claimed that he hadn't, in fact, stolen Alec's bunny-printed boxers and hung them strategically around the entire Institute on display for visiting Nephlim to see.

_Jace_.

The person that the poison (or whatever it was) in him had decided to focus on, despite having had a flamboyant boyfriend with double – no, _triple_ - his personality for almost three months. It physically hurt.

He liked that Magnus didn't force him to speak, just sat beside him and held his hand, but to be so close to him and think of someone else felt so entirely unfair. So _wrong_.

Magnus must have noticed something, because when he said his next words, his voice sounded stiff. "Can I talk to you outside, Alexander?"

Alec scowled at the use or his full name, but obliged. Sooner or later he'd have to talk this out. He let Magnus pull him up to his feet and guide him towards the doors, watching as the others woke up to see what was going on. He felt Simon and Jordan's sleepy stares. Maia and Clare were still sleeping. He didn't glance at Jace.

Magnus closed the doors softly behind him. "How are you feeling?" he asked again.

Alec shrugged. "Fine, I guess. Why do you care?"

Again, the hurt expression flashed through Magnus's face. "I'll always care about you," he whispered, "even when I can't have you."

"Why can't you?" Anger was slowly seeping in, filling up the emptiness he'd been feeling. Anger at himself, at Magnus, at the whole damn world.

"_Alec_," Magnus said firmly. "Is there something you would like to talk about?"

"No," Alec said immediately.

A sigh. "I can tell when you lie, Alexander."

Alec crossed his arms stubbornly. "You asked me if there was anything I would _like_ to talk about. There really is nothing I would _like_ to talk about."

The warlock's patience was unwavering. "You know what I meant."

"No, I don't."

"What were you thinking about?"

"You want to know what I'm thinking? Why do you care about me? How can you care about me? I never completely trusted you. I tried to shorten your life! I tried to explain afterwards. All my life, I've tried and tried and tried. But never once in my life have I ever gotten what I wanted." Everything he'd been keeping in, all those thoughts and ideas and emotions just came crashing down, flowing out of his mouth and spitting it all out on his ex-boyfriend. "Do you know what it was like to be eleven years old and have your heart beat so loudly every time your freaking adoptive brother walks into the room and have no idea what's wrong with you? What's so inexplicably yet unexplainably wrong with you? I thought I was, God, diseased or something for a while. I thought about just ending everything in case anyone every found out. Six and a half years, Magnus! And no one to tell. Not a single soul."

"Come here."

At those two words, Alec's body betrayed him instantly, his arms wrapping around Magnus's slim waist despite the shrill profanities his brain was screaming at his muscles.

He was a man wasn't he? He wasn't supposed to be sobbing on another man's shirt, hugging him tightly and pressing his face to the other man's chest like a three-year old might do to his mother during a storm at night. He was supposed to be tough. Shadowhunters didn't cry. What would happen if his dad walked by right now? Or his mom? By the Angel.

But Magnus held him like there was no tomorrow, uncaring of who or what might pass in the hallway and see them together. "I just want you to be happy," Magnus whispered. "And if that means chasing after the person you truly love, then go for it. Be happy."

Alec stopped crying for a second, blinking the tears back. "But you-"

"Will be fine," Magnus said softly, almost crooning. "In a love triangle, someone's going to miss out. This time around, it'll just be me."

His heart painfully stuttered as Magnus said the words, but Alec didn't want to think about it any more. He just held onto Magnus for all he was worth.

"Magnus, I really did love you, you know," Alec whispered, his infuriatingly girly sobs finally coming to a halt.

"Yes," Magnus agreed. "But you never could let go of that first love, could you?"

Alec didn't answer, but Magnus probably got the message by the way he just hugged him tighter.

The sparkly warlock he'd shared so many days with – so many memories with – moved so smoothly Alec almost didn't feel it, but suddenly painted red lips were pressing onto his own. It was so unexpected that Alec didn't respond at first, just stood there as Magnus cried his good byes into the kiss. When Magnus finally drew away, Alec clutched the other man's sleeve desperately, not wanting to lose something else as well.

"Don't go," he whispered. "If you really love me, you'd give me a second chance."

Magnus shook his head softly, trying to detach himself from the shadowhunter's grip. "I'm not heartless," he said. "I know two boys in love when I see it."

Alec's grip held strong. "Yeah," he said, tears threatening to spill out again. "You and me."

The glittery man only smiled wistfully. "No," he said. "You and _Jace_."

The raven haired boy could feel his eyebrows draw upwards in confusion. "But Jace has Clary," he said.

Magnus smiled again, but this time the pain was better hidden. "You'll find out soon enough," Magnus said, and started to walk out the door.

"Wait!" Alec ran after him, not wanting to lose the warlock he'd fallen so hard for.

But when the warlock turned around, Alec almost flinched. The green-gold eyes he'd come to love were masked in anger, and instinctively, Alec took a step back. "You have to choose, Alexander, between Jace and me. And I think we both know who your heart belongs to."

Magnus was no longer talking soothingly, gently and like a lover. His voice betrayed his anger, his hurt, his bitterness, the same way his eyes did as he walked away, slowly but firmly, the same way he had down in the train station, barely two weeks ago.

Alec wanted to let loose a guttural scream, to yell back that his heart didn't even belong to anyone now, because Magnus had walked away from him and Jace was an untouchable star lightyears away from the planet he was grounded on. His legs wouldn't work, though; his muscles stayed stiff and aching until Magnus walked out of his view, and even then his legs wouldn't work. After what seemed like an hour, Alec slowly trudged up the beautiful carpets of the Institute, understanding why Jace always felt the need to hurt something or someone else when he was angry. Slowly, he made it into his room and locked the door, lying on his bed and gazing at the early stars that had appeared in the fading afternoon light, a hollowness taking over his body.

At some point, without even realizing it, he slipped into a sleep, only to be haunted by nightmares once again.

* * *

Meanwhile, in a nearby room, a certain golden haired boy was holding a sulk-fest of his own. He sat on his bed, staring at the wall and ignoring the buzz of his cell phone. It was probably Clary, who had already texted him fifty-three times in the last week, and didn't seem to be capable of giving up or taking a hint.

On the tenth buzz, Jace chucked the phone at the wall.

He got up, his nerves on fire; his body restless to do something, to go somewhere, to do _anything_ but sit around moping.

Jace shrugged his favorite leather jacket and worn-out jeans on, keeping his ragged gray t-shirt, and grudgingly picking up his cell-phone and putting it on mute with no vibration just in case. He then proceeded to make his way out of the Institute.

Jace only made it to the door of his bedroom when he heard a gut-wrenching scream, followed by a couple hysterical sobs. Alarmed, he ran towards the source of the sound, his own gut feeling uneasy. The parabatai bond was tugging at him. Even more alarmed than before now, Jace dashed into Alec's room, finding Alec twisted in his sheets, his face contorted into a look of agony.

Jace panicked. He quickly knelt before his parabatai, shaking his shoulders urgently the way he had when they'd been trapped in that unholy basement. When that didn't work, he looked around for something, anything that would wake the other boy up instantly. Jace found a glass and inspiration bounced into his brain. He grabbed the glass, filled it with water from the bathroom sink, and dumped the liquid onto Alec's face. Nothing happened.

"Izzy!" Jace yelled, running out of the room. "Magnus! Clary! Simon!" By now he was almost hysterical himself, calling out names of people who couldn't possibly be expected to help, but he didn't care. Alec looked like he was _dying_.

"What's going on?" Isabelle asked, coming out of her room. Large headphones hung around her neck, resting on her shoulders and a few strands of her hair.

"Alec," Jace gasped, pointing to the direction of his parabatai's room. "We need Magnus."

Isabelle's eyes widened in alarm. "Is he having one of those coma things? Magnus left instructions."

"Hurry up," Jace said, nodding his answer to Isabelle's question.

Isabelle ran into her room and came back out with a piece of paper. Jace snatched it out of her hand and dashed into Alec's room again, Isabelle trying hard to keep up with him. When they both got to Alec's room, they found him lying on the ground, awake and breathing hard.

Jace roughly picked Alec from the floor and checked his face, holding the taller boy up while Isabelle ran her thumb through Alec's face, making sure he was okay and wiping away the remnants of the recently fallen tears.

"I'm okay," Alec mumbled, still not completely awake. "Put me down."

Jace obliged, setting Alec down on his bed gently.

Isabelle immediately sat next to Alec, but when Jace took a step forward, he saw the blue-eyed boy flinch. Miserably, he took a step back.

All the sounds in the room, the sound of Isabelle talking, Alec talking, Maryse and Robert from across the hall coming in – all of it were blurred background noises. He could vaguely hear everything, his body physically there but his mind miles and miles and miles away, until finally someone shouted, "Leave me alone! What's _wrong_ with you people?"

He turned around to see Alec draw the covers around him like a protective shield, staring back angrily at his family. "I'm _fine_! I'm not some baby that needs taking care of! Go away!"

Maryse looked like she was about to say something, but she let her husband pull her out of the room. Isabelle's eyes flashed with hurt too, but she held her head high and looked at Alec one more time before quietly walking out as well. Only Jace was left now. Alec turned his cold blue eyes towards him.

"I was talking to everyone," he said, his glare intensifying, "when I asked you guys to get out."

"I know," Jace said, trying to act calm and unruffled. "I can't imagine you'd want to talk to _me_ after all that's happened."

Alec frowned, but it wasn't from hate or anger this time. It was confusion.

"Hey, Jace?" he asked timidly, just as the golden haired boy was about to open the doorknob to walk out.

Jace turned around. "Yeah?"

Alec stared at him for a while, but then looked away. "Never mind," he said. "It's nothing."

"What did you want to say?"

His parabatai took a deep breath. "What happened between you and Clary?"

Jace sighed, though whether it was from relief or disappointment he wasn't sure. "We broke up," he said simply. "Anything else?"

Alec shook his head.

Just as he was about to go, something white caught his eye. He picked it up from the desk shoved into the corner of the room and read the words printed carefully on the paper.

Dear Jace, (or whoever's reading this – but if you're not Jace, you should probably give this letter to the cocky blonde bastard),

Unlike what Sebastian said, the poison isn't running through his veins. My magic is far too weak to even _try_ to take the poison out, and I expect that will be a miracle in and of itself, but for now, there are ways to weaken the effects of the drug.

Firstly, I've figured out that his brain, and specifically the part that controls his emotions, has absorbed the poison. Try to relax him. Make him laugh, smile, or play his favorite music or whatever (as long as it's not a love song – watch out for those). Do whatever you need to do to calm him down for the next two weeks.

Secondly, be careful for personal space. He's probably going to be extremely sensitive about everything you do or say, so you have to be extra cautious around him. Tell everyone else that too. Trust me, you may think those little hissy fits you throw occasionally or big, but wait till Alec gets mad. Dear god, you do _not_ want to be within a fifty-mile radius of him if you plan on getting to your next life untraumatized. I think he's learned a lot of it from you and Izzy and put it together to create his own form of rage. I applaud Maryse and Robert for not having gone insane years ago with all three of you under one roof.

Thirdly, this hurts me the most to say, but show him some love. I don't mean brotherly affection. I've seen the way you look at him when you think no one's looking, or the way he tried so hard _not_ to look at you when he saw you happy with Clary. Make him trust you. If he does, he might be able to manipulate the effects of the drug to work in his favor, but if it doesn't at least he'll wake up to the fact that you love him. That's all that matters.

I'll be back in about a week or two to restore his peace of mind. Hopefully, my magic will be back by then. If not, then I'll send you an email or something and schedule a day.

Sincerely,

Well, you're smart. You'll figure it out.

P.S. Don't hurt the redhead, whatever you do. She's been through a lot.

P.S.S. Speaking of Clary, she's been coming around to my house occasionally. Ask her to bring some glitter with her next time – without my magic I have none. Do you know how depressing my house looks right now?

"_Jace_." Jace looked up through the golden hair falling into his eyes and into Alec's cold blue ones. "Get out."

"Look, I understand that you–"

"No, you don't!" Alec screamed. "You don't understand _anything_, you thick-headed idiot. Get out!" His voice cracked on the last word.

Jace stared at the wretched, dark, shuddering shadow of his parabatai sitting before him, trying to process how Alec, steady and grounded, could ever be reduced to _this_, this hunched figure quaking from fear and hate and God knew what. Alec's words had stung, but he knew from personal experience that Alec was only insulting him to get him out of there. Finally, he turned to go, only to be called for again.

"Jace?"

The golden boy took a deep breath, trying to keep his patience.

"Yeah?"

"What happened to Sebastian?"

Silence.

Jace turned around, trying to keep his face expressionless but knowing that he was utterly failing.

"Did you- Did they…?"

Jace shook his head. "He got away."

Alec nodded, and then turned around to face the other direction. Jace took the hint and walked away, but not before leaving the letter from Magnus next to Alec's rigid body.

Quietly, he slipped into the shadows of the Institute.

Alec fell in and out of a wave of consciousness for the next five days, the nightmares taking over his living hours. He couldn't end it – despite what Magnus had written in the letter to Jace, Alec didn't want comfort, because he knew that with it came the price of pity, and he didn't want that. He kept the door of his room locked, and didn't answer when his parents pleaded him to come out, or when Jace banged on the door, or when Isabelle

And the twisted part was, that despite having told Jace that he never wanted to see him again, he _did_ want to see him again. Really badly. And every time he heard footsteps now, he unconsciously strained his ear to hear if Jace was out there, remembered his ongoing nightmares, and curled back into his misery.

But there was more.

Alec craved the golden boy's company, craved it to the point where he almost lived for the nightmares, didn't care if they occurred, because after all, even though his heart broke magnificently each time, there were always those moments when he was at bliss, happily making out with the guy he'd wanted to love freely since they'd met.

On the sixth day, Alec finally broke. If he'd thought he was broken for the past few days, boy, was he wrong. He sneaked out of the Institute at night and walked into a bar. Despite being only eighteen, with his height and I-haven't-slept-all-week look, he'd convinced the bartender to sell him as much as alcohol as he could carry. Alec had then staggered all the way back to the Institute and then locked himself into the room, where he had proceeded to drink as much as he could, throw up, fall into a nightmare, wake up, and then drink some more. By the fifth time around, he finally felt a little satisfaction, although his room smelled horrible and his head was dizzy. Alec was wasted.

Dizzily, he stood up from the floor, clutching a bedpost and accidentally banging his head on the corner of the wall. He threw himself onto his bed and lay there for a while, watching the sun come up and the city begin to wake, although he knew that New York never really slept. When he got bored, he closed the curtains and fell asleep again.

The nightmare was one of the worst. None of it made sense. One moment, Jace and Alec were happily together, just laughing and talking and complaining about life, but something happened and suddenly he was bloody and scratched up, not just his skin, but his heart, which was swelling up and growing, almost bursting out of his chest, until-

It was vague. It was misty. It was _horrible_.

Alec woke up in a pool of sweat and vomit, disgusted by both the dream and his surroundings. He got up wretchedly and walked to the bathroom. On his way there, he saw a sharp glint flicker in the darkness. He thought nothing of it.

An hour, two showers, another nightmare and a growing pile of laundry later, Alec was slumped against his wall when he saw the glint again. Tired and miserable, he picked up the blade emitting the glint and stared at it for a while, not sure if he was brave enough to do it. He walked into the mirror with it, wishing there were clear, laid out instructions somewhere in a book. Staring at the bathroom mirror, he wondered. Through his chest? His head? His wrist? Which would be quicker? Which would hurt less?

He took a deep breath, made a decision, and then sliced his skin open with the blade.

It was Isabelle who, with the help of Jace's angelic strength and Simon's vampire strength, finally broke down Alec's door. "I don't care if you're sick!" she had yelled. "I'm coming in there!"

There hadn't been an answer. Alarmed, Jace and Simon had broke down the door and were now staring at a surprisingly clean bedroom, save for a corner of the room that looked so repulsive that Jace almost threw up. Quietly but quickly, they searched for him- looking underneath the bed, behind the corner of the infernal pile of God and Alec knew what (Simon did that one; since becoming a vampire, he could hold his breath indefinitely), through his closet.

In the end, there was only one place they hadn't looked – the bathroom.

Alec looked down at his right forearm. Did he have to cut both wrists or just one? Did being a shadowhunter mean he couldn't bleed to death if he replaced blood three times as fast as regular mundanes? Forcing the questions out of his mind, Alec stared at the experimental cuts he had made, thinly sliced skin lined with red droplets of blood. They trickled down his arm in either direction, making it look like an intricate web of red that spiraled through the pale of his skin.

He lifted the blade one last time over what he hoped was the magic spot.

This was it.

Jace flung the door open and saw Alec holding a blade over his wrist. For a moment, he stood transfixed at the sight of so much blood and so much water, mixing into watercolors on the floor. And then, as if written by the hand of a bad novelist, something incredible happened.

His mind _worked_.

His body sprung into action and he flung himself at the blade in his parabatai's hand, just as Alec brought down the blade onto his skin with unbelievable speed and grace. Sliding on the ground unceremoniously in all the blood and spilled water, Jace tried to snatch the blade from Alec's hand, but his parabatai had jerked forward and cut a deep gash in his own golden skin. His parabatai bond tugged forcefully at his chest, and by the pained looks in Alec's face, his did too. The blade, in the midst of all the chaos, had flung up into the air and was rocketing back in the direction of Alec's head, who was glaring at Jace unaware of the knife waiting to slice him –

"Alec!" Jace swung his legs to pull Alec out of the knife's way, but there was a golden _snap_ and the knife was lodged deep in the wall next to the bathtub. Jace looked up and saw a gasping Isabelle with her whip unleashed, currently dangling from her hand with the tip curling onto the floor. Simon appeared behind her, saw the blood everywhere, and hastily walked back out, his fangs glistening in the bathroom light.

Presumably without thinking, Isabelle flung herself onto her brother's arms, hugging him tightly and cursing at him and nearly decapitating Jace with the forgotten whip. "How could you do that?" she whisper-yelled. "How could you even think of doing that?" Her dress was now soaked in red, the same way Jace's clothes were, but he didn't care.

This was his fault. If he'd been more forceful, maybe Alec wouldn't have tried to end his life. Maybe he'd even be half-healed, or at least somewhat happy. Feeling the familiar sense of guilt wash over him, Jace quickly stood up, wanting to leave and take his mind off things.

"Hey, Jace?" Jace turned around to see Isabelle, still sitting next to Alec but not clutching him anymore. "Can you bring back a stele and some food? I wanna watch over him for a while."

"I don't need watching over," Alec grumbled, still looking a little shocked at what he'd been about to do.

Isabelle turned on him instantly. "Yes, you do," she said. "Last time you said that, _this_ happened. If you think I'm ever letting you out of my sight again for the next ten years or so, well, you're dead wrong."

Jace winced at her wording, but Isabelle hadn't realized what she'd said and Alec didn't seem inclined to fall apart anytime soon. Silently, he walked into Alec's room, grabbed the stele, and tossed it to Isabelle. He then walked to the kitchen in search of something edible. Although it wasn't the healthiest thing in the world, Jace came back with some leftover Chinese take-out and a bag of chips. It was better than nothing.

He gave the food to Isabelle and left the room, wallowing in his thoughts.

All three siblings (and Simon) had agreed that what had happened in Alec's bedroom was to stay in Alec's bedroom, because if the Clave somehow heard about it, they'd call in the Silent Brothers to check Alec or keep him locked up, and everyone agreed Alec had had enough of that. Alec was still irritated that they thought he needed watching over, but he guessed it was only fair after what he'd tried to do. Right now, for example, Isabelle was trying to feed him some soup she'd made, but it was pink and had unrecognizable objects floating around and was grateful when there was a knock at the door.

"Come in," he said. Anything to get out of eating Isabelle's cooking.

Jace walked in, his hands in the pocket of his jeans as he slowly walked in. "Can I talk to you? Alone?"

Isabelle stared at Alec and then Jace, as if wondering whether or not it was safe to have both of them in the same room. "Sure," she shrugged, after a while, but the troubled look didn't go from her eyes. It did, however, erase from _Alec's_ eyes, when he saw his sister bring the bowl of soup to wherever she was going.

"Hi," Alec said warily, eyeing Jace stand awkwardly by the door. "You can come in, you know."

"Thanks." Jace came to sit in the chair Isabelle had been sitting in just moments ago. "Listen, I just wanted to tell you something, in case I miss the chance in the near future or something. Have you read Magnus's letter?"

Alec nodded.

"What he said was true. I really did love you. All these year, I never noticed, because I took you for granted, but now, with you almost dead–"

Alec started to pinch himself. Jace noticed.

"What are you doing?" he demanded.

"This is a dream," Alec told him. "And you and me and everything here will go away in just a minute or two, and then thing will be back to normal. Isabelle will wake me up and tell me I've accidentally fallen asleep in her soup and now she needs to go and make some more while I sit here and try to choke up whatever's already gone through my esophagus.

"Your nightmares are about me?"

Alec didn't meet his eyes. "Every time," he whispered.

"This is going to sound really inconsiderate," Jace started, before he could make a conscious effort not to. "But why?"

Alec raised his eyebrows.

"You know, in the bathroom. Why?"

Alec sighed. "I was drunk," he said. "And miserable."

"You have shiny black hair, cool blue eyes, eyelashes that girls would kill for, and penmanship the likes I've never seen," Jace said.

Alec shook his head. "It was the nightmares. They were doing my head in. I thought they'd never end."

"Hadn't you read the letter?"

"How should I have known that you didn't write it?"

Jace rolled his eyes. "Do i look like I have flouncy girly cursive handwriting that loops over around itself like that roller coaster we rode when we were ten?"

"I remember that roller coaster," Alec said, his eyes on some faraway place. "That had been Izzy's idea."

Jace grinned, happy that Alec was doing something other than brooding. His happiness was short-lived, though. Alec's eyes were beginning to get heavy, and he began to slump in his bed. Jace drew a sharp breath as he caught his parabatai halfway to the floor. Alec was heavier than he looked, and Jace had to struggle a little to lift Alec and place him neatly on the bed. Then he thought, _to hell with everything_, and stripped down to his boxers and climbed into Alec's bed next to him, lying under the covers, shivering but having Alec's body heat to warm him up. Sleep quickly overtook him, especially since it was nighttime anyways and he wasn't hungry and he'd just came back from fighting demons all day. He let the rhythm of Alec's heartbeat lull him to sleep, his eyes gently closing and his muscles relaxing. The last thing he felt was Alec's arm reaching over and pulling him closer in his sleep.

It was only in the morning when they woke up that Jace realized that Alec hadn't thrashed around at all last night, and had instead slept blissfully for over ten hours.

"Come on," Jace said, yawning. "You've got to wake up some time."

In answer, a pillow was stuffed in his face. Jace's heart swelled up a little.

It wasn't much, but hey. It was a start.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so maybe it wasn't exactly the fluffy ending I promised, but I couldn't do it without making it seem incredibly out-of-place. The next letter story will probably be lighter, less angsty, and shorter. And possibly in another universe... **

**In other news-**

**UGH. I wrote the whole thing and then pressed Save, but then my stupid computer decided that it couldn't display the page, so I had to reload the page, and when I did, about two thousand words were just deleted, because it didn't save, so then I had to write the whole thing again. I honestly felt like yanking my hair out, gluing it back on, going to kill whoever the heck owns Safari, and then yanking my hair out again when I failed the murder (I can't even steal a French fry from my friends at lunch). And I was really proud of my writing too… WHY IS MY COMPUTER STAGING A MUTINY AGAINST ME? WHAT DID I EVER DO TO IT?! (Actually, maybe I shouldn't answer that question...) So that's why it took so long to update - I kind of got discouraged. **

**On a happier note, well, you know the drill - suggestions are always welcome, and please review!**


	6. S Is For Stolen

**A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in so long. I really am. But my computer kept randomly shutting down and then wouldn't let me log on, so... okay, I'll stop making excuses. On a happier note, I'm doing this thing called NaNoWriMo, and I'm actually doing pretty well, despite the fact that I signed up four days late...**

**Right. Back to the story. Well, this one's rated K+, and there's mild Jalec. It kind of builds on one of the other ficlets before this one, so I hope you enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: No. Just _no_.**

* * *

**S Is For Stolen**

**To say that Jace was surprised was an understatement. To say that he was raging, surprised, and slightly disturbed didn't even begin to cover it. Someone could have handed him a thesaurus and he still wouldn't have found the right words to use for what had happened when he stepped out of the shower.**

"This is disappointing," he told Alec. "And shocking. It's disashocking."

His parabatai and boyfriend, currently sprawled on his immaculately made bed, looked up lazily from his book and blinked. "Um, Jace?" he asked. "Where are your clothes?"

The blonde looked down at the amused figure on his bed. "I don't know," he bit out, "because _somebody_ stole my clothes and relocated them without my knowing."

Alec sat up. Jace could see him trying not to smile, but it wasn't working. "I see," Alec said, pretending to take notes like a cop. "When was the last time you saw your clothes?" Jace threw a nearby book at his head, which gracefully sailed a foot above its intended target. "You missed!" Alec said gleefully, who hadn't even moved.

Jace thew his hands up in frustration. "Of course I missed," he said. "I'm still grieving the loss of my clothes. What am I supposed to do?"

"You could always borrow something of mine," Alec suggested, smirking. He closed his book and got up.

Jace shook his head. "Oh no. _No_. Your clothes are shabby at best, and I don't even have any underwear."

The color drained from Alec's face and immediately proceeded to turn red. "You don't?"

"No, you utter moron, because whoever stole my clothes stole my boxers as well. Do you see now why I don't want to walk around in your pants?" If possible, Alec's face turned redder. He actually looked kind of cute like that... Jace snapped his attention back to the present. "Where are you going? You need to help me out here!"

Alec looked at him warily. "I'm going to my room, Jace. Surely I am allowed the right to do that?"

"Not now you don't," Jace said, taking Alec's arm and dragging him through the hallways. "As my parabatai, you are forced to help me whenever I deem necessary."

Alec looked at him strangely. "You know, I don't remember a clause in the parabatai oath about helping each other find missing _underwear_."

Jace stopped moving completely, almost making the raven haired boy walk into him. "Would you rather I walk around naked all day?"

"Um, no?"

"Exactly." He continued to drag his boyfriend to Isabelle's room.

"You were wrong," Alec said after a while, breaking the silence.

"Hmm?"

"It's not disashocking. It's also hilarious. It's disashockinglarious." His laughter ceased when Jace punched him on the shoulder.

When they reached Isabelle's door, Jace pounded on the door. "Isabelle?" he yelled. "I know you're in there! Open up the door!"

Silence.

"Argh!" Jace yelled, and broke down the door with a hard shove. "I swear, Izzy, when I-"

Alec walked in calmly behind him. "You know, I don't think that was necessary," he said mildly. "She's not even here."

Jace blinked and then looked around, noticing his surroundings for the first time. "Right," he said. "Well, let's just see if my stuff's here."

It wasn't. After half an hour of looking, both boys decided that Isabelle wasn't the culprit and decided to move on. "Okay, so if it wasn't Isabelle, and Maryse and Robert and Hodge would need serious brain damage for something like this to happen, that only leaves us one person," Alec said strategically. "Hey, where are you going?"

Jace had been about to walk in the general direction of the kitchen. "I'm hungry," he shrugged.

"You're going to go in wearing that?" Alec raised his eyebrows, indicating Jace and the sole gray towel he was wearing.

"Okay, fine. Can you go in and get me something?" he asked. "And possibly something to drink? If Maryse is cooking in there, I don't want her to see."

"Don't want me to see what?" Maryse strolled out of the kitchen and almost strolled right back in. "_Jace_, what are you _wearing_?"

"Fabric?" Jace hazarded.

"Actually, mom, I think the better question would be 'what are you not wearing?' Cuz' you know-"

Alec was interrupted by a screaming Maryse. "I did not raise my sons," she yelled, "to run around the Institute wearing nothing but a towel! Yes, you may have angelic features, Jace, but don't let it get to your head! I will not have you running about like one of those mundane male models! Go and put some clothes on right now! We are going to be having guests today afternoon!"

"But-"

"I don't want to hear excuses! Go!" Maryse looked so terrifying that Jace obliged and ran out of the room, Alec following behind and laughing hysterically.

Jace glared at him. "I thought you were supposed to be on _my_ side."

"I am," Alec said, between big gasps of breathy laughter. "Come on, let's check Max's room."

Jace smirked. "You think _Max_ stole my wardrobe?"

Alec looked at him. "Yeah, well, looks can be deceiving."

Jace nodded in agreement, opening the door to Max's room and walking in. "You're right," he said thoughtfully. "After all, when I first saw you I thought you were reasonably intelligent."

"Hey, I'm helping you here. It might do you some good to be nice to me sometime."

"Sure, whatever." Jace was already digging under Max's bed, but his thoughts remained on what Alec had said. Blushing unnaturally furiously, he clawed through the magazines, toys, books - and _voila_! The blonde stumbled on something of his own. They were a worn out pair of jeans - so old he'd forgotten he still owned them - but he had honestly never been happier to see his clothes. He dragged more stuff that looked suspiciously his out from under the bed and found all his boxers and his pants. The rest of his clothes were still missing.

"Found anything?" Alec's voice bounced from the tiles in the bathroom.

Jace scooped up his favorite boxers and jeans and walked over to the bathroom, where Alec was still looking for his clothes behind the shower curtain. "Get out," Jace said, playfully shoving his boyfriend out of the bathroom. Keeping the door closed, he quickly changed, grateful for at least the bottom half of his clothes.

Alec was still waiting outside when Jace came out of the bathroom, clad in nothing but ripped jeans. "That's all you found?"

Jace nodded. "Can't believe _Max_ had all my stuff. The little kid might actually amount to something someday." He grabbed Alec's arm and started walking again.

"Where are we going _now_?" Alec complained. "I just spent half my morning helping you find clothes. Can't you just wear one of my shirts and wait until tomorrow to drag me around everywhere?"

The blonde considered this. "Fine," he said slowly. "But I refuse to wear anything with holes, frays, brown in color, or remotely sweatery. Understood?"

Alec laughed. "Whatever, your majesty," he said sarcastically, steering Jace into the direction of his own room. Jace's heart started to beat a little faster, although why it was doing it so was ridiculous. He'd been in Alec's room plenty of times before, and it had always been the same. Besides, it wasn't as though they were going to do something special in his room. He was just going to borrow a shirt. That was all. There was no rational reason for him to have a heart attack in the near future, unless a relative of his came back from the dead to meet them, or a duck appeared out of nowhere for a surprise visit, but neither of those seemed highly plausible. On the other hand -

His thoughts were interrupted when a black t-shirt hit him in the face. "Thanks," he said, grinning at Alec and slipping the thin material on. The raven haired boy grinned back.

"One last stop and then I promise I'll stop bothering you," Jace said, walking out of the room. Alec followed behind.

"Where are we going again?"

"To find Max," Jace explained. "I need to chew the kid out and find out where the rest of my clothes are. Then I'll leave you alone."

"Fine," Alec grumbled, but he didn't seem too annoyed.

* * *

It was Church who finally solved Jace's mistake. After not being able to find Max _anywhere_ for about half an hour, the Persian cat had finally came to Jace, rubbed his head on the blonde's leg, and started strutting away. It was Alec who had suggested they _follow_ the cat to see what it wanted to show them. Sure enough, Church led them straight to the dining room, where a lot of Jace's shirts had been clawed through.

Jace looked at the cat. "Why would you do such a thing?" he asked it dramatically. "How could you?"

The cat stared right back at him and blinked.

"Wait, so Church did all this?" Alec asked, crouching down to collect Jace's ruined clothes from the tabletop. Church hissed at him and opened his mouth, showing a row of small but oddly fang-like teeth. "Okay, okay, calm down!" Alec said, and hastily pulled his hand away.

"I think he's trying to tell us something," Jace said thoughtfully.

"So what, you're the cat whisperer now?" Alec asked, throwing his hands up in frustration.

The blonde cocked his head to the side. "I never really got that phrase," he mused. "What does whispering have anything to do with - oh."

Alec turned around to look at him. "Oh, what?"

Jace exhaled. "I should have known it." He pointed to the ruined shirts on the table. "Look."

Alec looked, and this time his eyes lit up with understanding. Those _eyes_... Jace mentally slapped himself.

His blue-eyed boyfriend had started laughing, pausing occasionally and laughing again. "How did I not see it before?" he said, over and over again.

The scraps of the blonde's shirt had been rearranged haphazardly to make the letters I-Z-Z-Y W-A-S H-E-R-E. And they had to admit it was pretty creative of her.

Jace was shocked. Alec had never laughed this much for this long - he was almost worried that a con-Martian had come to Earth and kidnapped the real Alec to take his place. He looked back instinctively at his parabatai, who was still laughing. "I think," the raven haired boy said slowly, "that this was in revenge for last week, when you-" He couldn't finish his sentence; he'd been overcome with hysteria again.

Jace smiled crookedly. Alec was referring to the - ah, _incident_ - last Monday, involving a squirrel, some cheesecake, and Izzy's mascara. But that was another story entirely.

"Well, at least she doesn't know about the pasta," Alec said, stifling his giggles for a second.

"Oh, crap," Jace moaned. "Oh dear lord."

"Yup," Alec said, finally having his laughter under control. "You are _so_ screwed."

Jace gave him a mischievous grin, the type he usually reserved for flirting at public places with random girls. "Unless..."

"Oh no. _No_. We are _not_-"

"Oh yes we are, and you're helping, too. Come on." Jace swung an arm around his boyfriend's shoulders and kissed his cheek, quietly victorious when he saw a brush of scarlet color Alec's pale, angular cheekbones. "Now, let's go see if we can find some frog legs..."

* * *

**A/N: As usual, Isabelle was behind all the trouble. Next time, maybe Jace and Alec will come up with a scheme to get her back... ****Anyways, please review! I really don't care if it's constructive criticism or something else, but please, _please_ review! I do a little happy dance every time I see a new review (which you really don't want to see). And thanks, you-and-I-we-have-the-stars, for sticking with me for so long. I really do appreciate your effort. I think it's the reason I keep writing these. **


	7. H Is For Halloween

**A/N: This one's rated K because I don't think there's even any cursing or anything. Or there might be… well, you'll see.**

**Disclaimer: If I were Cassandra Clare, why on earth (or any planet, really) would I be writing _fan_fiction for my own series? Besides, I think by my complete lack of humor, it's pretty evident that I'm not the author of the Mortal Instruments Series, which made me laugh hysterically. Especially CoFA. I think it's because Simon and Jace were stuck in the same apartment, and that can be dangerous... like, nuclear bomb dangerous... right, I'll stop stalling. Onwards! (*slaps forehead - that was so cheesy...)**

**H Is For Halloween**

Beads of sweat dripped down Alec's face. His jaw was set and his fists clenched. His shirt stuck to his pale skin and his tumbling hair kept falling into his eyes. All in all, he looked pretty hot. In both senses of the word. Jace gripped his dagger tighter, knowing that Alec was going to attempt offensive for once. He was right. In a flash, Alec's blade came swinging at him, slicing the air in front of the blonde's nose as he instinctively leaned back and rolled over. Jace locked Alec's legs with his own, making the tall boy fall over on the floor. The blonde looked down at him triumphantly. "You're supposed to be a _shadowhunter_," he said, smirking.

"You're supposed to be angelic," Alec retorted. He tried to get up, but the blonde had sat down, his legs still locked with Alec's. "Let me up, Jace," he said irritably.

The blonde grinned cockily but let him up. "Quick question," he said, picking up Alec's fallen blade from the floor. "What is Isabelle scared of?"

Alec shrugged. "I dunno," he said, taking the blade from Jace and shrugging a well-worn jacket on.

"What do you mean you don't know?" Alec followed his Jace out of the training room. As usual, they headed out to Alec's room. For the past week, he'd been trying to teach Jace Chinese, although where the blonde's thirst for foreign languages had rose, he wasn't sure he wanted to know. "You've known her for sixteen years!"

Alec shrugged and opened his door. "And you've known her for six."

"At least _try_ to guess," Jace said, sitting on his bed with his legs folded. "High-calorie yogurt? Ducks? Hideous people?"

"Why do you even want to know? And since when has Izzy liked eating yogurt?" The dark haired boy picked up a textbook. He himself had no clue how to read or write Chinese, but he had always been the fastest to learn from books. Isabelle got distracted too easily, and Jace normally got bored.

"Oh my God, do you think she's afraid of her own cooking?" Jace's eyes had gone wide.

Alec did a double take. The last time Jace had looked this excited about something had been the time when he had decided to see if vampire motorcycles could run on water. "Wait, what is this for again?"

The blonde was still stuck in his thoughts. "Nah, otherwise she would have stopped a _long_ time ago." Although, Alec couldn't find it in himself to disagree. "So what does scare her?"

"I'm thinking..." Alec actually thought. Had Isabelle ever come running to his room the same way Max did? "Thunder and lightning!"

Jace looked at him as though he'd said something spectacularly retarded. "How the hell am I supposed to recreate a thunderstorm?"

"I don't know... but I have great faith in your abilities." Alec opened his textbook. "Can we start?"

But the blonde was paying no attention to him. "Oh my God! Do you think Clary could make a rune for it?"

Sighing, Alec snapped the textbook shut, wondering how long this would last. "No."

Jace got up from the bed and pulled Alec's cell phone from the top of Alec's bedside table. "Let's go ask her!"

"No."

"Hmm... Oh my god, I have it! I know what will scare her!"

"You know, I think you'd have better luck with the high-calorie yogurt," Alec said seriously. Jace gave him a funny look.

"Not that," he said, rolling his eyes. "This!"

Alec looked at what Jace was holding up. It was a brown furred teddy bear, complete with giant paws and a stitched smile. Alec felt a pang go through his chest. "Mr. Brownie?"

Jace looked like he was trying not to laugh. "You named him Mr. Brownie?"

Alec got up and put the textbook back on his bookshelf. "You think that'll scare her?"

"I think this could scare the Seelie Queen," Jace smirked.

Alec scowled. "It's a _teddy bear_."

Jace grinned. "I know that. We just need to have Clary bring it to life with her special runes."

"Clary is pretty cool in some ways, and granted she's got some skills when it comes to runes, but she's definitely not the Blue Fairy," Alec said, snatching back Mr. Brownie from the blonde.

Jace looked confused. "The who now?"

"The blue fairy? From Pinocchio?"

"You remember that?"

"You don't?"

"Well, whatever. Let's see if Clary will do this." Reluctantly, Alec handed his iPhone to the maniacally grinning Jace.

Which is why a couple hours later, they heard a shrill shriek from Isabelle's room. "It's alive! It's alive and it's going to murder us all! My whip doesn't even work against it! What _is_ this? Jace!"

Jace, who was in the library, heard his adoptive sister screaming all the way from the bookshelf he was currently sitting on. "Hahahahahahaha - oh no! Run, Alec, run!" The brown atrocity had decided to walk to the library, and was now shaking the bookshelf the blonde was sitting on. Jace had no idea how it had gotten here so fast.

Alec looked unimpressed. "Calm down, it's just Mr. Brownie."

There was horrible ripping sound, and looking down, Jace realized the stitches on the bear's mouth were coming undone. "I will murder you all! I will shoot you down and –"

Alec cut him off with a high-pitched scream. "Run!" But the teddy bear started to grow, growing larger and larger until –

Suddenly, it was big enough to break through the walls of the Institute. The library crashed around them, shelves snapping and books slapping the ground in a tornado of papers as Mr. Brownie grew in size, destroying everything around him. Soon, it would be big enough to rampage the whole of Manhattan. Who knew what would happen after that? Would it chew the Statue of Liberty? Climb the Empire State building? Attempt to ride the Ferris wheel in the giant Toys 'R' Us store in Times Square? The possibilities were endless.

The teddy bear laughed. It was a low, rumbling laugh, but it grew in size as well, thundering around Jace like the speakers of a –

And that was when Jace woke up.

"Alec – Alec, wake up."

The dark haired boy in question rolled over on his bed and dug his face in his pillows. "Jace, what are you doing?" He briefly lifted his head to check the time on his wrist. "It's three in the morning."

Jace grinned. "I know, but I finally got a good idea for how to scare Isabelle on Halloween…"

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews - I kind of _live_ for them. Or write, anyways****.**


	8. B Is For Babysitting

**A/N: I have absolutely no clue where I got the inspiration to write this one. I really don't. So anyways, this one is rated K, and it gets a little disgusting near the end, so if you just ate... Actually, it might not be _that_ disgusting, but when I wrote it, the images that popped up in my mind were - um, well, let's just say it wasn't _pleasant_. This is not one of my best, but I really wanted to update something, so... enjoy?**

**Disclaimer: I strongly suspect that I am not Cassandra Clare. **

* * *

**B Is For Baby Sitting**

**(_Previously Titled_ B Is For Broccoli) **

"Come back!" Izzy yelled, running after the excited toddler. Alec watched as the Elias waddled through the arms of a chair and under the table. Isabelle crouched down on the side, unable to follow the toddler into the depths of the library's table.

"Come here," she tried, her arms beckoning the child closer. "I'll give you chocolate if you do."

Alec sighed. "You know we're not supposed to give them any more sugar," he said, leaning against a bookshelf. "Give that kid anymore sugar and he'll explode with hyperactivity."

From the armchair across from him, Jace chuckled. "Nothing says feeling better than a sugar rush."

Alec sighed again. "Where are the other two kids?" He was referring to Elias's older siblings – a spunky ten year old girl and her quiet eleven year old brother.

Jace shrugged. "I dunno. The last time I saw them, I think they were in the training room…"

Alec felt his face twist into a horrified expression. "You left those two in the training room?" he almost yelled. "What were you thinking? That girl's going to end up decapitating her brother! And you know what's going to happen then? Mom's going to decapitate _me_, for letting her _esteemed guests'_ kids chop off their own body parts!"

"Why can't they have brought these brats with them to the Conclave meeting?" Isabelle asked, getting up from her crouch with a cat-like fluidness. She seemed to have given up trying to convince Elias to get out from under the table.

"Brats?" The voice came from behind Alec. The dark haired boy swiveled around to see Elias's sister leaning on the doorway, all arrogance and dark colors. Frankly, Alec couldn't remember her name.

"She didn't mean it," Alec said frustratedly, running a hand through his hair. "Where's your brother?"

The girl shrugged. "I think he's in the training room," she said, smirking slightly. Oh dear lord in heaven, this girl was a younger, female version of Jace, except instead of being all gold, she was all black. "I'm hungry."

"Let's have lunch then," Isabelle suggested. "I can cook something for us."

Alec turned back around, his face paling. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Jace looking kind of nervous, too.

"That's okay," Jace said. "I'll save you the trouble and order Chinese." He ran out of the room before Isabelle could say anything back. Elias's sister smirked again. "This should be interesting," she said, and then promptly turned around and left.

"Remind me again why we agreed to do this?" Isabelle asked, eyeing the toddler under the table, who was now tasting his own foot.

Alec shook his head warily. "I have no clue," he said. "Absolutely none."

* * *

As Alec soon found out, simply getting the kids to the dining table took herculean effort in and of itself. Isabelle had appointed herself the task of convincing the toddler out from under the table, so Alec and Jace were stuck trying to find the other two. The girl had walked back to the training room, it seemed, but the brother was nowhere to be seen. Quiet and bookish, he probably could have wandered all through the Institute and not be found for a month. The thought itself was terrifying.

"Let's play a game," Jace said finally, his gold eyes glinting dangerously. "I'll give you three choices. You find your brother, you find your brother, or you find your brother."

"What was the second option again?" the girl asked cheekily.

Jace's eyes flashed. Alec decided to step in. "Alright, that's enough." He turned to the girl. "Let's see who can find your brother the fastest."

The girl rolled her eyes, obviously not swayed. "What's the prize?"

Prize? "There is no prize," he said bluntly.

The girl raised her chin defiantly. "But there has to be a prize! You can't make up a game – a pointless one, at that – and not have a prize."

"Okay," Jace said slowly, his gold eyes now cooled to amusement. "If you win, then – Congratulations! You win a lifetime supply of air! Not valid underwater, in space, when dead, or while choking." He grinned down at the young girl, who was scowling ferociously back up at her.

"Fine," she said, turning around. "I'll play your stupid game." She stalked off, oddly reminding Alec of Isabelle when she used to be a bit younger.

The dark haired boy turned to Jace. "I suppose we have to go find that kid now, too," he said sighing. "Let's go."

Instead of going anywhere though, the blonde smirked, his hair falling into his eyes. "We still have plenty of time," he said huskily, stepping closer to Alec. The dark haired boy felt his cheeks warm and bit his lip.

"Jace, there are kids in the Institute right now. I don't think it's really the best time for–"

"You worry too much," Jace whispered, taking a step closer. "Stop talking."

"Make me," Alec challenged, acutely aware of the fact that he sounded like he had the maturity of a six year old. And then he realized that Jace meant for him to say that. The blonde grinned and pressed his lips forward on Alec's gently, and the dark haired boy realized that he had walked right into it.

Not that he minded.

* * *

Alec stared at the toddler for a while. "How on earth did you get him to come out from under the table?" he asked Izzy, who grinned.

"I promised him something," she said, and then

"Why did you have to order vegetables?" the girl whined, lifting a broccoli with her plastic fork.

Alec looked at the ceiling and prayed. It must have worked, because Jace answered. "Because you need to have a well-balanced diet and eat vegetables as well as other things and – Oh, God help me, I sound like Maryse."

Izzy rolled her eyes. "Looks like you accidentally paid attention to her once and now it's leaked into your brain. Poor you."

"Oh, the horrors," Jace said absentmindedly, poking at his own food. "Why _did_ I order this?"

Alec sighed for what must have been the millionth time that day. "You didn't, remember? It just comes with the rice and the mu shu pork."

"If he's not eating it, then I'm not either," the girl said, crossing her arms across her chest.

Alec gave Jace a pleading look. "Just eat the stupid broccoli. You've never minded it before." He turned to the girl. "Your brothers are eating it. Why can't you?"

The girl rolled her eyes again. Anymore and it would be stuck rolling around like a Ferris wheel. "_He'll_ eat anything you put in front of him–" she pointed to her older brother – "and _he's_ barely doing what you can call eating." She pointed to Elias. "He's just grinding his face into that green mush."

It was true. Isabelle had long since given up trying to feed Elias the baby food and had just handed the toddler the jar along with a plastic spoon. The toddler was now throwing food around to his heart's content.

Alec jerked his chin at Jace. "If he eats the broccoli will you?" he asked the girl.

She mulled it over for a while, and then almost imperceptibly nodded. Alec looked at Jace, who was looking down at the broccoli with revulsion. Why couldn't the Chinese restaurant have sent a different vegetable? God…

Jace looked up at Alec. "You know what?" he said, putting his fork down. "I think I'm full." He made as if to get up from the table, but Alec grabbed his arm and pulled him back down.

"Eat," he said, enunciating the word clearly.

Jace looked at the girl. "Let's just make a deal. If anyone asks, we ate all of it. But since nobody will, I'm doing to this what I've done to all of Isabelle's creations in the last four years. Follow me."

"_Jace_," Alec said, but the blonde paid no attention to him. Instead, he picked up his plate – which had been cleared of everything but the broccoli – and carried it out the door. The girl followed, and so did an indignant Isabelle. Out of curiosity, Alec decided to tag along.

They followed Jace into a bathroom, where he simply flushed it down, watching as the green vegetable swirled around and around, faster and faster, until it finally went down. Alec gave Jace a withering look. "Would it really have killed you to use the trash can?"

Jace grinned, showing the slight chip in his tooth. "What would be the fun in that?" The girl beside him grinned as well, and then decided to flush _her_ broccoli down the toilet as well. This time, though, the toilet made an odd noise, and then –

"Everybody get out!" Alec yelled, and nobody hesitated. Quickly, they ran out and closed the door, locking it for safe measure. Weird gurgling noises continued to come out of the bathroom, followed by a large splash. Alec felt everything he'd just eaten come up his throat, but he forced it down. After a couple of minutes, the noises died down from the bathroom, but nobody volunteered to open the door.

"And _that_," Alec said, glaring at Jace as green tainted water slowly seeped out from under the bathroom door, "is why we don't flush vegetables down the toilet."

The blonde beamed as though he'd done something exceptional. Which in a way, he had. Exceptionally childish, that is. At least the broccoli was all gone.

Slowly, Alec ushered the crowd back into the kitchen, where a shocked Maryse stood. Robert was just a couple meters away, and so were the parents of the three kids.

"What _happened_ in here?" Maryse asked, her nose twisted in disgust. She was looking at Elias, whose face was now completely and utterly covered with green mush, as though he'd just visited a facial massage place. All he was missing was the cucumbers on his eyes, which he'd creatively substituted for pieces of chicken. Alec looked back up at his mom.

"If you think _this_ is bad," Jace said from somewhere behind him, "don't go into the bathroom on this corridor. You'll be traumatized."

Maryse raised an eyebrow and then brought it back down again. "I don't think I even want to know what you're talking about." Her statement was confirmed when they all heard a disgusted yell from said bathroom. Alec quickly looked around. There were supposed to be four adults, but he could see only three. That meant –

Oh _crap_.

He, Jace, and Isabelle all ran out of the room, trying to avoid Maryse's shrieking behind them. Quickly, they turned a corner, all cocking their heads to the side to hear what Maryse was yelling about.

"–if the Silent brothers were visiting the Institute? We could have _lost_ the Institute, you irresponsible–"

Jace's voice cut through Maryse's like glass. "Do the Silent Brothers even _need_ to use the bathroom?"

Alec shook his head, simultaneously leaning further down the wall, until he was just sitting on the ground. "I don't want to know," he said, closing his eyes. His siblings' laughter rang in his ears.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I wasn't really sure how to end it, so… yeah. Sorry for the crappy ending. Also, I'm really sorry I didn't update for a while. My heater broke down for some odd reason, so my family and I were all stuck downstairs in the living room for three whole days with just one portable heater, where there are no computers. I tried to type on my tablet, but do you know how hard it is to type an entire story on a seven-inch tablet? Well, neither do I, because I gave up after writing three words.**

**In other news, thank you guys so much for the reviews! I got _five reviews_ on the last chapter alone, so I mean it – thank you guys. You people make my day.**

**Anyways, sorry for rambling on the first paragraph, but I just needed to tell you guys that. I truly admire all of you fanfiction writers (although rather grudgingly) who can update on a regular basis. Really, I do.**

**Review?**


	9. W Is For Wasted

**A/N: A lot of this was inspired by Jonathan Stroud, who wrote the Bartimaeus trilogy. If you haven't read it, well, go read it. It's awesome. Anyways, I just had to use a quote from him. It's the one about burning people – you'll see – and I wanted to give him credit for that. So yeah. In other news, this ones' rated K+, I guess, and Sebastian's here, but it's not angsty. In fact, he's kind of out of character. Like, he's snarky and mean and all that, but his back-story's different. Also, I took another stab at humor, so brace yourselves. Anyways, enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: My name isn't Cassandra Clare. I think that should be quite obvious by now. And if it's not, I think you need therapy.**

* * *

**W Is For Wasted**

Alec struggled to keep the very drunk Jace upright. "Hey, Izzy, help me, will you?"

Isabelle twirled past them, her arms around a geeky boy with brown hair, glasses covering his brown eyes. Even after four months, Alec didn't know what Isabelle saw in Simon. Still, if his sister was happy, he was happy, and Alec tried his best to generally not interfere.

"Sorry," she said, dancing around them. "But I've got a date and I'm sticking to it. I'll be back in the Institute by twelve, in case mom asks."

Oh crap. Their mom. If she saw the state Jace was in right now, she'd have a fit. To say the least. "Thank you so much," Alec muttered, and then glanced at the dizzy blonde, who was now standing very still, so still that the dark haired boy knew something was up. "What is it?" he asked softly.

In answer, Jace pointed his chin to another boy around their age, walking towards them. In the flashing lights of Pandemonium, Alec's eyes had a hard time seeing who it was, until the figure was about four inches away from them. Then he audibly gulped.

"Hi," Sebastian said, his mouth forming a sneer as usual.

"You look pink," Jace answered, giggling and leaning forward to poke Sebastian in the nose. Unfortunately, the tall, fine-haired boy wasn't as drunk as Jace was and didn't seem to appreciate the gesture.

"Do you remember how we parted?" he asked, his eyes ablaze.

"No," Jace said, although his gold eyes indicated that he thought otherwise. Then again, he was wasted.

"You set light to me," Sebastian said, through gritted teeth. "Struck a match and left me burning in the cornfields."

Jace, through his dizzy state, shifted uneasily, and nearly fell over in the process. "That's a gesture of endearment in some cultures," he said slowly. "Some hug, some kiss, some set each other on fire in small patches of woodland…" Alec looked up at Sebastian, who didn't seem too convinced.

"Come on," Alec said, slowly backing away. "That was a long time ago."

"I nearly burned to death!" Sebastian yelled. "My arm was nearly – oh, hello." His date seemed to arrive. And not a moment too soon. Giving them one last glare over his shoulder, he slung an arm around his date's slim waist and walked off.

"He always was a drama queen," Jace said, frowning at Sebastian.

"It doesn't matter," Alec said, sighing. "Let's just get you home."

Unfortunately, that was easier said then done. "Look at that big concrete floor," Jace said, grinning impossibly wide. "It's so… _big_."

Alec looked down at to Jace what was pointing at and sighed. "You mean the parking lot?"

Jace regarded it thoughtfully. "Parking lots are cool," he said after a while, and decided to march on. Alec rolled his eyes and followed.

After about forty seconds of walking, Jace stopped and reached into his pocket to pull out a rock.

"What is it now?" Alec asked wearily, aware of the other people on the sidewalk staring at them oddly.

Jace looked sadly at the pebble in his hand. "I think my pet rock has died," he whispered softly.

Alec looked up at the sky for help. In answer, it started to drizzle. Great. "Listen, Jace, you're _drunk_. Absolutely wasted. You don't _have_ a pet rock. It was never alive."

Jace looked at him angrily. "It was too alive," he said stubbornly. "See?" He held it in his palm and shoved it towards the dark haired boy's face. "But now it's dead."

Frustrated, Alec took the rock and threw it as far as he could.

"You killed it!" Jace cried, positively hysterical. People were now crossing the street to walk on the other sidewalk, just to avoid walking past them. "You killed my rock!"

"But you said it was dead!" Alec said, half in exasperation and half in frustration.

"I said I _thought_ my rock was dead."

"Well, now we know for sure," Alec said, wiping his hair off his forehead. The drizzle was coming down harder now – turning into a heavy downpour. "Look, let's just get to the Institute, okay? Then we'll figure out how to resurrect your pet rock back to life."

"Okay," Jace said, looking at Alec through his eyelashes. "I'll go get it."

Before he could even do anything, the blonde was off, running like lightning in the other direction. "Why do I even bother?" Alec said, mostly to himself, and then chased after Jace. Of course, he wasn't as fast and when he finally found the blonde bastard, he decided not to interfere right away and approached him cautiously. Jace was yelling at a police officer, who was looking at him with mild amusement.

"I'm not drunk!" Jace was shouting.

"Where do you live, son?" the cop asked. "Your speech is slurred. Wouldn't want you driving or causing havoc. I'll drive you home."

"My speech isn't slurred," Jace insisted, looking indignant. "I'm talking in cursive."

Alec bit back a laugh and walked back to the exasperated police officer. "Um, sir?" he said, trying to get the cop's attention. "He's with me. I was in the process of getting him to our house, and…"

The cop chuckled. Thank god he had a sense of humor. "It's okay," he said. "Just get out of the rain, or you'll catch a cold. And do a better job keeping your friend on a leash. Might do you some good to just handcuff him…"

Alec knew his eyes lit up. "Actually," he said slowly. "May I?"

* * *

Pandemonium was a lot farther from the Institute than he had realized, as Alec soon found out, especially if you were handcuffed to the aforementioned very drunk Jace. Thankfully, when they finally reached the Institute a couple hours later, Maryse and Robert had long since gone to bed. Jace, in all of his drunken state, happily slung an arm around Alec's shoulder and proceeded to have a conversation with the old elevator door. Alec wondered what he had done to make the Angels think he deserved this. And to top it all off, Isabelle and Simon had already reached the Institute and saw Alec and Jace stumbling out of the elevator.

"What took you so long?" Isabelle asked, an arm put around Simon. "We just grabbed a cab."

Alec shrugged. "We didn't have any money on us."

Jace suddenly stood up, as if he were going to make an important speech. He urgently dug around his pockets – his jacket pockets, his jeans pockets, his sock pockets (yes, _sock_ pockets) – and held up a total of fifty dollars, waving it in the air triumphantly.

"It's not funny," Alec said darkly, glaring at Isabelle and her boyfriend, who were snickering.

"Tree huts," Jace said suddenly, looking very thoughtful. "The native Americans used to live in little tree huts." And with that, he dozed off on Alec's shoulder, snoring slightly.

Simon grinned. "It _could_ be funny," he said cockily, "if you tilt your head to the right, squint, close your left eye, lean forward–"

Alec gave him a withering look. "_Ahem_."

"Never mind," Simon said, laughing. "Wait, why are you handcuffed?"

"It's a long story," Alec said, waving his hand dismissively, the way he'd seen Jace do a million times. It worked. He took a fistful of Jace's shirt and dragged him into his bedroom, not wanting to see his sister and her annoying boyfriend smirking any longer.

Carefully, Alec knelt down next to the bed and tucked Jace in. He was about to turn around when he realized that he was still handcuffed to the blonde. Oh great. Jace came to. "Stay with me?" he asked sleepily, grabbing Alec's free wrist.

The dark haired boy chuckled, instantly forgetting all the havoc Jace had caused in the past hour or two alone. "I don't think I really have a choice," he said settling himself into Jace's bed. "Unless I go get a seraph blade or something or – well, too late." Jace had already fallen asleep on his chest. Alec looked up at the ceiling, being careful not to turn sharply, and twirled a lock of Jace's blonde hair. In a couple minutes, he dozed off too, blissfully unaware of the fact that they were still handcuffed.

* * *

**A/N: So, what did you guys think? I definitely liked this one better than the last one, but... Review? **


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